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I always used bra`s so I guess you know, nice I guess. Can you please stop it? I like know I am telling but my mind wont like accept it, and I would just like to shut off the laptop, but I want to keep chatting with you for just a bit more.

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What's the difference between Tiger Woods and Santa Clause? Tiger Woods is a well-known golfer and Santa Clause is a mythical man who delivers presents to young children.

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roses are blue violets are red... i have to use the bathroom

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Roses are Red Violets are blue This joke isn't funny And neither are you!

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What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a bigger worm in your apple.

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What would you call a two-foot Irishman named Max? Max.

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Every time I walk across the street I do the Hitler march and raise my arm straight out to salute him, if I feel like holding up traffic, I take smaller steps

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There once was a man from Nantucket He decided to sail to Portland Now he lives in Portland.

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Q: Whats Brown and sticky A: an eagle except for the brown and sticky part

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One Zebra and One Elephant was walking in the desert, the Zebra said its hot and the elephant said i know.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting a girl pregnant.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Scott Scott who? Scott Henderson. Oh my god Scotty! I haven't seen you since highschool, please come in.

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How do you tell if a politician is lying? You make him take a polygraph test.

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Do cows get breast cancer or utter cancer?

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Actual jokes are now obsolete.

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Why did the bunny hit the drum? It didn't because it did not have the mental capacity or physical capabilities to do so

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm schizophrenic and i am too

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whats awesome? a blade of grass with a mexican hat and a revolver.

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Two muffins are in the oven, one muffin says "Gosh it's hot in here!", the other muffin says "HOLY CRAP A TALKING MUFFIN!".

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How are Justin Bieber and Lady Gaga similar? They are both men except Justin Beiber

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Believing in God may be a sign of autism Kappa

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Q: What did the guy say to the apple? A: suck me off

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops