Why did the black man go to hospital? To cure his black.

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How can you tell if a duck is under your bed? Look under your bed

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Why did the kid fall off his bike? His mum threw a fridge at him.

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How do you make an apple puff? Put the apple in a large pan with some water. Cover and cook gently for 20-25 minutes until soft. Add sugar and nutmeg to taste. Transfer to a bowl and leave to cool. Cover with pastry and bake until well-risen and golden.

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Guy 1: Why did Captain Hook die? Guy 2: Because he wiped his anus with a hook? Guy 1: No, because everyone dies.

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I was gonna make a gay joke but those are insensitive, and gays have feelings like everyone else

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What happens when you cut down a tree? It falls over.

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Q:What did the boy do when his girlfriend cheated on him? A:He broke up with her because cheating is wrong and he deserves better.

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A black man is like a sledge hammer; if you compare him to a sledge hammer, he will hit you with a sledge hammer.

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A piece of paper got wet. I stuck it over the fireplace to dry off, but it lit on fire.

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If a bunch of midgets do the wave, is it a ripple ?

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Why didn't Cheryl's mother recognize her when she was wearing a blue shirt and jeans? Because Cheryl's mother has Alzheimer's.

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Why did the pilot crash the plane? Because it wasn't a pilot it was a toaster.

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how do you make a baby cry? you throw a brick at it's face!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because I was on the other side. And I'm a chick magnet

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Who went shopping on Saturday? There is a reason I put a question mark there, so you guys could reply. Not so I could respond myself.

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Yo momma's so fat she weighs more than the average woman of her age and height

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Obama

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What do you call a guy sleeping with little boys? Michael Jackson

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Why did the road cross the chicken? Well, according to Einstein's Theory of Special Relativity, if you and the chicken were to cross the road simultaneously, your perspective, relative to the chicken, would remain unchanged. Therefore, the road would appear to move underneath the chicken, which would seem to be performing some style of polka dance.

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How do you make your mom mad? Burn down the house and eat the dog.

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I like my coffee like my women. Without a penis.

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what did i get my mom for her birthday? Nothing im selfish

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A bomb went off in japan where did sally go Everywhere

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops