Knock knock! *no answer* KNOCK KNOCK! *still no answer* the person who was knocking finds a note sticked on the door and it says: i will be away for 2 weeks

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Guess what else smells like tuna!?! A dead tuna fish in a can

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Why couldn't the child go to the park? He was a registered sex offender.

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Roses are red, Bacon is brown, this poem makes no sence, BACON!!

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Why didn't the man answer the Anti Joke? He had a severe mental disorder and was therefore incapable of speech.

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Why was 2 afraid of 81? Because seven eight nine.

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what do you call a deer with no eyes? Blind

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What did Zeus say to Hades? Nothing. Both are mythological beings created by the Greek civilization to explain why many things in the world happened, mostly because of a lack of modern science.

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Q. Why did the little boy fall off the swing? A. Because he has no arms.

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There was three women stuck on an island, a blonde, a brunette and a ranga. They are saved days later.

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A blonde was taking a Math exam, so she brought her Asian boyfriend with her. It turns out they were going to his father's retirement party afterwards.

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Have you ever seen the inside of Stevie Wonder's house? Neither has he.

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Yo Mamma's so dumb... She cannot manage to find a decent job without her GED.

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An overweight person falls down the stairs.. They had to be taken to A&E as they suffered very serious injuries.

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I fantasize about having sex with a moose

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Three men walked into a bar. Despite the fact that the bar was not an oblong piece of solid material as many would assume, the men entered through the tavern door simultaneously and found it most uncomfortable and awkward to be squished up against each other for several moments.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? I have a gun. Get in the car.

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What did Jesus say when he made the first black person? What another perfect creation to this world!

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What animal was two legs and bleeds a lot? half a dog

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Why did little Bobby put a firecracker in the dog's ass? Don't worry he used lube.

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pudding

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In Soviet Russia, there was a movement to be renamed into the Russian Federation, which passed on December 25, 1991.

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When I was in 4th grade, I was fat. The other kids would take my lunch and spit in all the food, then give it back. Teachers started to wonder why I wasn't eating, and soon began to ask me if I was anorexic. I replied, "do I look anorexic!?" I'm now 6 foot 3 and weigh 56 pounds. *FUN FACT: based on a heartwarming true story.

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Why did the CEO step down? Because he was very ill and could no longer meet his duties and expectations as Pear’s CEO.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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