What is worse than the holocaust. A worm in MY apple!

If you are American when you walk into a bathroom and American when you walk back out, what are you when you are inside the bathroom? You're probably dispelling waste products from your body.

Confucius says... The superior man, when resting in safety, does not forget that danger may come. When in a state of security he does not forget the possibility of ruin. When all is orderly, he does not forget that disorder may come. Thus his person is not endangered, and his States and all their clans are preserved.

Q. Why did the little boy fall off the swing? A. Because he has no arms.

Whats the worst thing about dying? Your not alive anymore.

What did John say to Paul before they entered the car? "Paul, get in the car."

Women deserve equal rights.

What is big, red and eats rocks? A big red rock eater

What did the schoolgirl say to some of the people of Anti-Joke.com? You're sick. Stop talking about the Holocaust.

what looks about a computer which has two wheels? a bike. i lied about the computer...

knock knock WHO'S THERE?! ARE YOU A SEX CRIMINAL?! NO ONE WANTS TO DO THAT TO YOU MUM!

A jew walked out of a bar then goes to the other bar across the street then walks out from the back door to go to another bar The Actions of this jew tells us that there are only 3 bars in the zone and one pet shop

When birds fly south for the winter they fly in a V formation. one side is always longer than the other. why is that? Because there are more birds on that side

Q:whats the wost thing that can happen to you when you find something? A:not finding something

Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Because it was sick and tired of all the repeated monkey jokes and commited suicide and preceded to fall out of the tree.

Q. What did the girl on drugs get for Easter? A. Down Syndromes Disease.

Q: how do u make a fireman cry? A: set his wife on fire

Guy 1: "Smells like UpDog in here." Guy 2: "No it doesnt.."

you walk into a bar Griffin: 'are you ok'

How do you rape someone? No, its a question. I don't know the best way to go about this.

Why do jews love money so much? Because money is very valuable and everyone loves it.

why did the girl stop laughing? there was nothing to laugh about.

Knock Knock. Who's there? Dementia.

Patrick, I just thought of something funnier than 24. Lemme hear it. 25.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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