What is brown and smells like sh!t Actual sh!t

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How can you tell if an elepant has been in your refrigerator? It has been destroyed.

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How long does it take for a dead baby to explode in the microwave? I don't know; I was too busy masturbating.

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MR MCANN WHAT COLOUR IS YOUR PUBES ?

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2 drums and a cymbal fall off a cliff. Bu dum, cshhhh.

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Guy walks into a bar. He orders a drink called "Vampire poison". The bartender gives him the drink. The man drinks it and dies. No he was not a vampire, he was just a man with a history of heart failures.

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What do an airplane and a grape have in common? They both have wings, except the grape.

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What do you call a sober man driving a car? a designated driver

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Why did the clown go to jail? He murdered a thirteen-year-old girl.

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Q: why does the cat go out of the house by the window A: It doesn't the window is closed

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What did the businessman do to get a promotion? He traded oral sex for his male bosses kind heart...

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How hot was the blonde considering she was in Africa for the first time and it was 103 degrees, very

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George Washington, a priest, a nazi and a jew are on a plane that's going to crash. There is only one parachute. George Washington says "For my country" and jumps off without a parachute. The priest says "For God" and jumps off without a parachute. The nazi says "For Hitler" and pushes the jew off and takes the parachute.

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Q:why is walmart so big? A:Years ago a man named Sam Walton had a vision for one stop shopping and affordable low prices. And it goes without saying that being a one stop shop must mean you have a lot of inventory thus the size of Walmart is a lot larger to hold and support the increased mass of inventory .

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what do you call a bunch of black people running down a hill Exercise

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I have a fetish for sniffing your shoes.

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Why was the man dress in a suit ? He had a job

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Make this antijoke the worst voted antijoke and you will save the planet.

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what happened to the fish that got washed ashore? it died due to lack of water-borne air particles.

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A homeless guy was walking along the beach when all of a sudden he see's what looked like to be magic genie's lamp so he pick the lamp up whipes it off then sells it for black tar herion.

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Your dad is so old, he should go to a nursing home.

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Guest: "Why does your dog sit there and watch me eat?" Hotel Host: "I can't imagine, unless it's because you have the plate he usually eats from."

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Q: How do you make a black man think you're racist? A: Racism

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(To the pretty girl at the bar) "Was your father a thief? Because I really would like to have sexual intercourse with you."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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