Q. How do you know when an asian has robbed your house?? A. Like any other thief, most of your expensive belongings will be gone it depends on duration of robbing and their morality

what is the difference between Rick Perry and Lindsay Lohan? it only takes Lindsay 4 1/2 hours to finish a sentance.

What's red bubbly and spins around? A baby in a microwave

What do you call Mexicans who go to jail? Criminals.

A bar walks into a man

James Patrick Campbell

A black person goes up to the drive through at popeye's, what did they say? Nothing, it was closed.

Q: how do you get a live elephant into a refrigerator? A: you buy an industrial sized refrigerator from cost-co and then walk the elephant slowly but surely through the door. Q: how do you get a giraffe in a refrigerator? A: after removing the elephant by means of walking out the door, slice the giraffe into small pieces approx. 1m by 1m by 1m and put those into the refrigerator

A baby seal walks into a club.

knock knock who's there? dave dave who? dave suddenly burst into tears as his grandmothers altzimers became so serious she forgot his name

An iman, a rabbi and a priest walk into a bar. It's not the same bar. They feel uncomfortable mixing together and this makes me sad.

Your momma is so dumb, she failed the IQ test.

what looks like a bug, lives in larch mount and lives in a mansion? Aodhan Hearty, lied about the mansion... he lives in a web with his buggy family

What's green and invisible? This cabbage in my hand.

Knock Knock. Doors open

How did the black man fall of the cliff? He was gazing over and realized he had Prostate cancer and fell off the cliif.

Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

Why did the woman leave the kitchen? She had finished her breakfast and had to get to her job as a firefighter.

What happens if a Muslim leaves their bag on a bus? They quickly return onto the bus and get it.

Dimes are silver Pennies are brass Why does your face look like an a**

roses are red, violets are blue, hes for me not for you, if by chance you take me place, ill take my fist, and smarsh your face.

If a tree fell in the forest, and no one was around to hear it, would you like a cupcake?

What do black people eat? What everyone else does!

A man walks into a bar............. The bar explodes and everyone dies

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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