What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into a worm and finding an apple

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a pan of muffins comes out of the oven one muffin says "hey im really burnt" another muffin says "oh my gosh! a talking muffin!"

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A. Big feet, you know what that means B. He has to order his shoes on line because they don't carry his size in stores.

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Q: How many cancer patients does it take to change a lightbulb? A: None, they are too weak to climb the ladder.

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A man walks into a coffee shop and buys a bookshelf.

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What did the black fire-fighter do when the house caught fire? The heroic man ran inside and got every animal and person inside to the out side and then proceeded to extinguish the flames with his fire-extinguisher out, thus saving most of the families valuables. He was then awarded a raise in his salary for his heroic valor. Although any fire-fighter could have done this because of the hard work and dedication that is put into training. So really describing the race that this heroic man is was totally pointless.

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How many fingers do u have? 11 Start with left pinky count 10,9,8,7,6 then 6+5=11

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Why can't Michael J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because he's human.

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How do you stop a blind kid from walking into oncoming traffic? .................to late!!!!!!!

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There is a blond and a burnette in a car. The blonde is driving. What a nice use of the carpool

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How many amish does it take to change a lightbulb? Presumably only one, but since they do not generally use electricity it has yet to be tested.

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What did the penguin wearing a blue sweater say to the sink? I am a penguin wearing a blue sweater.

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Knock Knock... Who's there? JUST LET ME IN!

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whats similar between a chicken and an alligator they both gobble except for they alligator

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An Englishman an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar... However, it's really busy, so they leave and go to a different bar.

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What did the Muslim receive for Christmas? Nothing. Muslims don't celebrate Christmas.

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why did hitler hate the jews... because the nazies had to pay the gas bill

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What's the difference between Neil Armstrong and Michael Jackson? Neil Armstrong walked on the moon and Michael Jackson appeared in court several times under charges of child molestation

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A blonde dies Lololol

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So a platypus walks into a bar. He orders a drink and then goes home drunk. His wife doesn't approve of his drinking, so she took her children then left. The lonely platypus wandered around for days on end in the lonely silence. He realized he wanted a job, but he couldn't get one, and i lied. it wasnt a platypus. it never even haooened i wasted your time.

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Why did my car stop suddenly? I had arrived at my appropriate destination.

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A muslim walks out of a plane.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have 5 fingers and the middles for you

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A man was about to be assassinated. The assassin said "do you have any last wishes? The man said he wished that a meteor would fly down and kill the assassin. A meteor actually did come down but that was predicted years back. The meteor fell on the assassin and killed him, the man, and any living thing aboveground on Earth.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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