What did the zen master say to the hot dog vendor? Make me one with everything,

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Why did the boy get hit by a bus? Because he was standing in front of the bus.

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What do you call a woman who is addicted to crack, has a light mustache and huge saggy tits, has had 4 kids with 4 different fathers and makes her living giving hand-jobs behind the bus station? Mom.

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whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Relizing its a used tampon covered with blood.

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If you are riding on a boat and all the wheels fall off, how many pancakes would it take to make a dog house? It does not matter because fish don't like tomatoes.

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good looking women

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What is worse than finding a dead bug in your coffee? September 11, 2001

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What's the biggest lie you've ever told? "I have read and agree to the Terms of Service"

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In a nerd wedding they don't say "i do" They say "i accept the terms and conditions"

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The awkward moment when you are reading these jokes and either it's not funny or you don't get it...

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Man don't you hated when birds shit all over your car! Man I'm glad cows don't fly!

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how do you get a cat out of a tree? shoot it

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Why did the chicken cross the road? What does chicken mean?

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Ask me if I'm a rock. Are you a rock? No.

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Wife: Does this make me look fat? Husband: Honey, your already fat.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says why the long face? The horse says my mom died from cancer

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Roses are red Violets are baskets This joke makes no sence... ... boobs

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An american family is picknicking on the bottom of the ocean. They are eating french fries, big mac's, chicken mc nuggets and drinking coca cola, some slurpies too, all purchased at the local mac donalds near lyndon blvd, in chevy chase near that weird house with the toothless lady that always smiles and then all of a sudden frowns at you, often wearing either a dark green or mint green dress. Spongebob squarepants comes drifting by dead in circular pants and little Sally, their youngest daughter asks a question, which cannot be heard because they're underwater.

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In a joke book: So a man walks into a bar. Suddenlly the universe around the author crack. Unable to sustain the infinite potential of punchlines, the author tumbles through an empty void amongst shards of his broken reality.

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What direction do 5 gay guys walk? I am unable to answer that because they are all aspiring to work in different occupational fields.

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A bear and a rabbit are taking a shit and. the bear eats the rabbit in a whole bite without chewing...end of story...the end

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What did the ice cream man ask the little boy? Want some ice cream?

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Stop looking at these jokes and go fuck yourself.

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why did the man break his arm? he didn't, someone else broke it for him

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops