A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says 'Why the long face?' The horse says 'My alcoholism is destroying my family.'

Q: What the difference between a Porsche and a pile of dead babies A: I don't have a Porsche in my garage

What do you calk a dirty mexican? a hard working gardener.

How many seals does it take to unscrew a lightbulb? Depends on how high the ceiling is.

I'm going as the joker for halloween

A: How can you tell a tree is an aspen? B: 'Cause of the way it is.

What happened to the black guy who got pulled over by the cops? He was told that his left tail light was out

What's worse than the holocaust? Microwaveable jellied horse nipple

the game

A man entered ten puns into a pun contest, hoping that one of them would win. Unfortunately, he came in third place and was discouraged by his loss.

Why did the school fall? Because a hurricane hit.

Jim: You wanna hear a funny joke? Tim: Sure Jim: Well, if you want a funny joke, this isn't the place to be.

A paralyzed person walks into a bar.

Why was the kid dizzy? He ran in a circle repeatedly.

Whats faster than a black guy with a tv? His brother who is a dentist and drives a fast sports car.

"Sticks and stones" the man said and shat on three different complex turtles

Chuck Norris has normal human strength.

Roses are red Violets are blue Hop in the van or I will rape you

Black people are like jelly beans. Nobody likes the black one's.

What's hard, long and screws a blond? An IQ test.

Guy 1: Why did Captain Hook die? Guy 2: Because he wiped his anus with a hook? Guy 1: No, because everyone dies.

What is 1 + 1 equal to? 2, because if you have one orange and if you add another orange, you will have 2 oranges, therefore 1 plus 1 is 2.

patty was in sunday school, the teacher asked her "patty who created the universe?" john sliped into the seat next to her and jabbed her with a pen "LORD ALMIGHTY" the teacher said' good patty now who gave himself for us? john again jabbed her with a pin "JESUS CHRIST" "that very good patty now what did mary say to joseph after they had their 23 child?" john jabbed her " IF YOU STICK THAT DAMN THING IN ME ONE MORE TIME ILL BREAK IT IN HALF!!!" the teacher fainted

A man crossed the road. A chicken stood in a doorway smoking a cigarette wondering why whenever he crosses the street his motives are always questioned yet men and other animals are allowed to go about their day normally. END CHICKEN DISCRIMINATION NOW!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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