Phew, I was like thinking all like "I am really into this guy, we can like chat like this and stuff too right?"

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what did the little girl with no legs and no arms get for christmas? Cancer

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? They scolded her and sent her to her room.

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What happened to the plumber payed in gum? His family left him because he was irresponsible with his business

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How did the little boy with cancer run in his running race??? Very Well....

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roses are red, violets are blue, i have alzheimers, cheese on toast.

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Do they censor Ass? TESTING TESTING ASS ASS ASS

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How do you cause ultimate pain to a imprisoned Jew during the holocaust? Moral: You give him an apple WITH a worm in it.

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Why did the black women sing to the left to the left? Answer: because black people have no rights

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Why couldn't little Tiffany play kickball with the other kids at recess? I chopped her legs off.

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Cool I just got a free Minecraft gift code at http://freeminecraftgiftcode.net

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Why cant Stevie Wonder read? Because he is blind

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every man comes from between a women's legs for the rest of their lives they try to get back in

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How do you remind your kids of family? You brand them with the family crest.

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Why was the fat guy so sad? Because he knew he would die sooner or later, just like every other human being

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Why did the chicken commit suicide? No one knows, he didn't leave a note.

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What has seven legs and cant walk? A paraplegic, and I lied about five of those legs.

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What's black and white and red all over? A newspaper... used to clean up a crime scene.

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Why can't Ray Charles drive? Because he's dead.

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How did the mexican cross the border? He went through border patroll, and then later became a legal citizen of North America

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Whats worse than stubbing your toe? Sandy hook

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Q-whats worse than getting shot. A-getting shot twice

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What's better than sex? I have never had sex and, therefor, do not have adequate knowledge of the experience enough to make a comparison to other experiences. You should ask someone who has had sex.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops