Why couldn't little Billy fall asleep. Because Billy didn't have any counting skills to be able to coins sheep

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guess what? WHAT? Idk.

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Roses are red, Metal is gray, Justin Beiber, is very gay

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple?  Getting raped by a 10 foot scorpion.

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A fish didn't walk into a bar, because fish cannot walk.

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Why did the man have a finger coming out of his ear? He had a birth defect.

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Chuck Norris isn't afraid of the dark. Because he's a grown man, and most grown men aren't afraid of the dark.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Blanket Blanket who? Blanket, son of deceased recording artist Michael Jackson. Ever since his father died there has been so much stress in the family that he could not handle it. He ran away and is now seeking shelter and grief council.

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Why did the little boy chase after his ball? Because it rolled away

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What's green and eats rocks? A green rock-eater.

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What does a banana and a helicopter have in common? Neither of them are a police officer.

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Why did the woman leave the kitchen? To go to work. And be sexually harassed. For 70 cents on the dollar.

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Why didn't the black boy get any presents from Santa? Because he isn't real.

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Why do chickens have feathers? Because chickens are birds and birds have feathers.

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Where did jimmy go when the bomb exploded.... (Everywhere )

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AHLTFKCITAWKSHTC

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How did the fireman get to the police station? He massacred his wife and children.

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Roses are red, Violets are purple.

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There was a black guy and a blonde crossing the street. They are not related.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being brutally murdered as you are watching your guts spilling out of your body

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Q: What did the two muffins say in the oven? A: OMG we are in an oven, "OMG a talking muffin"

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Who job is it to protect the forest? Obiously a male and/or female forest ranger of smokey the bear. It's that simple.

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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A batch of muffins is baking in an oven. One muffin says to another... Oh sorry, scratch that, they can't talk; they're f***ing muffins. (CSC)

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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