What do you call a white hankerchief dipped into the red sea? Wet.

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Two horses are playing in a field, One says to the other "Hey, sup" they then continue playing.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive a train? Because she's blind.

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And then Jesus turned the water into wine. Some did not approve of this miracle "masta, whut is da reezon you did aint make this into tha coolaid? Bible files: Directors cut.

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What did the German girl say to me? entschuldigen Sie (excuse me)

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why did the man have an axe in his car he kills children with it

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How many jews can you put in a four seat car? two in the front two in the back.

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why did the chicken cross the road? because he wanted to prove he wasn't chicken

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Three penguins sitting in a tub. The first penguin says to the third penguin, "Hey would you pass the soap?" The penguin in the middle says, "What do you think I am a typewriter?"

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how do u drown a blond you put a scratch and sniff sticker at the bottom of a pool.

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what has wheels and is red. A heart, i lied about the wheels.

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There is no "I" in "TEAM" However, there is a "T" an "E" an "A" and an "M"

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What did the traffic light say to the car? Bye.

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An Englishman, a Scotsman and an Irishman walk into a bar. They have some pints then leave to do their respective tasks for the day.

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What's the difference between two elephants? One is dead.

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Two penguins walk are in the bathtub and says "can you pass me the soap?" the other one looks at him quite quarly and says "what do you think i am, a chainsaw?!?"

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In Soviet Russia, the same thing that happens here, happens there.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Two giant paint bubbles!

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A man driving through a thunderstorm said, "look, it's rain, dear." His wife, being a reindeer, took offense to that statement.

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Jesus. Jesus who? You're going to hell.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To meet up with his friend that was on the other side.

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what do you call a black who stabbed your entire family? it all depends on what his name happens to be

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Lets just say I work for some important people, not the feds that is for sure, ill tell you when we meet, not here. As for my condition, lets just say that I am profusely bleeding noseblood now and that is because I forgot to take my medication, and if I had no medicaions at all, I would have begun bleeding out of me ears end eye sockets, and ironically id die from a lot of other shit before bleeding to death, so thats not even the case. Its nothing common, but I bet people could find out about it pretty fast on wikipedia, and as much as I like throwing shit on random people here, I dont like bothering anyone with my problems, in this case, it came kinda sudden and unexpected, and I dont mind sharing my deepest aspects including this with my best friends, of which one of them you clearly are love.

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Goodbye to the people who hated on me.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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