What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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What did the muffin say to the other muffin? "Hello, nice to meet you."

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So, why won't the blonde date the Asian guy? Because she's afraid of commitment.

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Q:What do you call a black man that got to the moon and back in a space rocket? A: A golfer, he is a pro golfer now!

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Knock Knock Who's there? The Gastapo

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Q:Whats worse then hard nipples A:The holocaust

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What did the sphinx say to the Minotaur? Nothing, as they are fictional creatures and in according to probable science, don't not exist.

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A horse enters a bar. The bartender looks at the horse and says "Why the harness?"

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There's now a sandwich named after Jerry Sandusky, it's got 60 year old meat stuffed between buns barely out of the oven.

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I had a lemon. hi.

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No pen- no notes No notes- no study No study- no good grades No good grades- no diploma No diploma- no job No job- no money No money- no food No food- really skinny Really skinny- ugly Ugly- no wife No wife- no kids No kids- lonely Lonely- death No pen=death

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Why was the grandomther crying? She just got pepper sprayed.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, We have your test results, You have cancer.

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How long does it take for a black woman to have a shit. 9 months.

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Why did the chicken commit suicide? To get to the other side.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the gay boys house. Knock knock! whose there? The chicken!!

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Whats funny about a fat person dying? He died while eating friend chicken

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What did the cannibal do after he dumped his girlfriend........... Wiped his ass

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What is red and smells like brown feces? Bloody feces

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A priest enters a bar moments after a young teen walks into the same bar. The priest scolds the teen, warning him of the possibility of arrest, alcoholism, and other bad life consquences. The teen apologizes to the bartender, and much later in life, he thanks the priest.

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Why am I constipated? I ate fiber glass insulation.

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whats do dinosaurs and people have in common? one of them is extinct.

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In space, no one can hear you scream. Which means Xenomorphs are deaf.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops