See now, that is because you consider yourself my submissive on a both concious and subconcious level, your body and mind wants me to take care of you. I could say it is because I read minds, but why read minds, when I can create them, why read the future, when you can create it. Finally, lets take a look into the word, nerve endings yes? Not nerve endings baby, its called Suggestion. But seriously though, lets put the word nerve endings on top of the word suggestions again there. Nerve endings, did I mention it works on your butt too? You see, usually you would say no, but you do know that now that I am your master, you do and enjoy as I say? See you baby. Moral: "Feel the grove, I control the way you move"

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A dancer walks into a barre

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Why did the fat guy pick up a noodle from the floor with his buttcheeks? He felt like pasta.

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Q: What do people usually find funny? A: A joke.

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What is fat and white? A polar bear with a glandular problem.

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What did little Timmy find at the bottom of the well? The fact that he could no longer breathe and thus causing him to drown.

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Robin, get in the Batmobile.

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I still remember the last thing my grandfather said before he kicked the bucket. He said: "Hey, I wonder how far I can kick this bucket."

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5 Christians, 4 Arabs, 3 Jews, and a Monkey are locked in a room with sticky bombs, hand grenades, a bible, and some bananas. What do they do? play scrabble

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Your momma is so ugly... Yeah, yeah, yeah my momma's ugly, but guess what, at least I'm not an orphan asshole.

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What did the blind deaf kid get for Christmas? Cancer.

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"Knock knock," said the guy about to deliver a knock knock joke.

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my grandpa told me "dont let fear rule your life" 2 hours later he got hit by a train.

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How did the man die? He was killed alive.

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Who is the best person to do your nails with? Nobody, you have no friends.

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Why are you gay? Because ***** you

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Why is this joke hilarious? Because it isn't.

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what is worse than gay sex wiping your ass with sandpaper

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how did harry styles get in one diretion god

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Tony Soprano walks into a diner

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why did the chicken cross the road, but didnt make it he didnt cross it. he was pushed by a band of gang members and hit by a bus

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What's Funny About A Black Man Being Shot? Nothing, That Man Was My Friend.

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Why did the man buy his wife expensive flowers? It was their anniversary and he is a faithful husband.

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Have you seen stevie wonders new piano? No Well it's really nice

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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