Whats a lion in Antartica? . Dead

Barack Obama.

I like my women like bacon. Greasy and full of wrinkels

What did the man do with the naked baby girl? He put some clothes on her and proceded to lay her down for a nap.

This time I saw it, so that is covert hypnosis, I mean normally people are aware that they are under a trance, but like now it was like huh? Until the last point there. You used caps in order to make it seem as if you where shouting, the mind reacts that way and bam! The hypnotic state leaves... ...I was kinda beginning to enjoy that... Nice, now I totally do not want to eat this thing, strawberry my butt.

Today we eat large amounts of pizza. The one piece had a lot of mushrooms. Like more than the other pieces. The cheese was flawless except for the burnt edges.

How many men does it take to change a light bulb? One.

Roses are red Violets are blue If you are reading this Then it must be deja vu

stephen hawking walks into a bar...

Roses are red the grass is green now open your legs and let me fill you with cream

Knock Knock Who's there? The KKK, got any blacks?

What does the Bill in Bill Clinton stand for? Bilious.

Did You Hear About That Mexican Who Went To College? no. Well plenty of them go to college every day. thats good to know.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Exercise

Whats the same between an elephant and a grape? They're both purple except for the elephant

Q: If 0+0=2 and four shampoo bottles is equal to two toaster strudels, how many pizza slices can Samuel eat? A: Winter because grass=6

The new Minons film reminds me of most foreign films.. You can't undertand a fucking word they say and they're all yellow

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it felt like it.

What do you call it when Justin Beiber has sex with a woman? Intercourse.

Why was the Mexican in the back of a pick up truck? There were not any available seats.

What's better than a stick? A stone

What did Yoda say to Darth Vader? The only time the two had talked Darth Vader was still Anakin therefor, he said nothing.

What did Batman tell Robin before he got into the Batmobile? "Hey Robin, get in the Batmobile."

What's invisible? A lot of stuff.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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