What has 2 legs and smells like fish A fish with 2 legs

There once was a man from Nantucket He decided to sail to Portland Now he lives in Portland.

so a moose walks into a super market and asked the lady where can I find the potatoes the lady says isle five so the moose goes to isle five and there aint no potatoes.

Why did Maggie shit herself? Because she saw her son.

whats black and yellow a chinese with a bruise

Your mother is so fat she has to have her clothing specially ordered, this brought her to a massive credit card bill and made your entire family bankrupt.

Why did the accountant die?A terrorist put a bomb under his desk.

Wats blue and always in the sky?? Cheese! Except cheese is not blue and it is not always in the sky... By Rachael Mcmullan

A black and a white walk into a bar, d.r. King would be proud.

A man gets home from work with red on his collar. His wife asks what it is. The man replies "I had sex with a young woman, your to old and you disqust me"

Q: So I don't get it. Do women actually like not having penises and testicles? Do they genuinely enjoy it? A: Silly boy. Women ADORE not having penises and testicles. You just can't get your mind around someone having different preferences in anatomy than you.

What's worse than finding gum on your shoe? Being molested by a sea urchin.

What's black and white and red all over? A seriously infected scab.

What's worse than ants in your pants? Uncles.

There's a black and a mexican guy in a car. Who's driving? The chauffeur.

How do you get a black man out of a tree? You provide him with a ladder of varying length depending on his height in the tree and hold the ladder to ensure that it is stable and safe while he is climbing down. If he his very high in the tree then it may be helpful to call the fire department for assistance in getting him down.

Q: What do you call a dog driving a car? A: A dog driving a car.

Why was the bartender's baby crying upstairs? Because it was being raped.

Patient: Doctor, do I have cancer? Doctor: Yes. Patient: Will I live? Doctor: No. Patient: So what do I do? Doctor: SUCK IT UP!!!

What do you do if you see a Mexican riding a bike? Say "Hello." It is polite.

Connor is such a dope, he doesn't even know Betty White jokes aren't funny.

Why did Hitler shoot himself He saw his his gas bill

Besides the kama-sutra, what is the most popular sex position in India? 68 and 88. Moral: Mutation people... mutation... use your imagination.., Still gotta feel a bit of envy/admiration, it is known as the happiest nation of the world, with a happiness rate with a constant well over 80 percent, and that is FAR over any other nation.

Whats the difference between a white man and a black man? Their skin color.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...