What's brown and sticky? Poop.

What's the best way to get high without doing drugs? Jump.

What does a black man and a monkey have in common? Until February 3rd 1870 neither could vote in America. Monkeys still can't. 

What did Harry get for his Birthday? Nothing nobody likes Harry.

How do you get 1,000 dead babies into a car? Blender How do you get them out? Straw

Can a match box? No, but a tin can.

What is worse than the holocaust paying taxes

How many times do you have to make an ass of yourself before you look like a retard and thinking ''random'' means funny? Fuck yourself HAHAHAHAHA seriously stahp

Person 1: Why can't a T-Rex clap? Person 2: BECAUSE THEIR ARMS ARE TOO SMALL! Person 1: No, because they are extinct dumbass

how do you save a car from falling out of an airplane? I don't know.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead

What do you call a guy with no arms or legs laying on your driveway? You call him by his name

My grandmother just called to tell me she was dying................. to have sex with me.

What's a vampire's favorite dessert? Vampire's don't exist What's Helen Keller's favorite dessert? Helen Keller doesn't exist

What's worse than an earthquake? Two earthquakes. What's worse than two earthquakes? Three earthquakes. What's worse than three earthquakes? The world exploding.

Who enslaves small people and forces them to work in his factory all year round in ridiculous outfits. Santa

What do you call a giraffe driving a car? A danger to society.

Knock knock, who's there? Your mom! Oh I'm comming.

Roses are grey, Violets are grey, I'm a dog.

Who is that? That is my daughter, She likes climbing trees.

yo momma is so fat she ate the rest of the joke

A woman asked me today if I'd ever tried crazy golf. I hadn't actually ever tried it.... So I replied "no".

How many babies does it take to paint a barn? It depends on how hard you throw them

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the lesbian's house. Knock knock. Who's there? The chicken.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...