why do some people of all races enjoy American foods? Because they can be extreamly delishus and satisfying to eat. Why dont some people of all races enjoy American foods? Because then we would all be too big to fit on earth.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Why is the old lady crying? I threw a fridge at her.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What did the banana say to the apple? Nothing, although on a deoxyribonucleic acid level, bananas are technically sharing 50% of their genes with us, humans, but yet still have the incapability to produce its own voice. In addition, apple can't talk either due to their lack of nerves, veins, arteries, and diaphragm, therefore bananas not apple cannot produce sound.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

HOw do u DEFeat thE hatErsz shitted on em

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Why did the giraffe fall over? Because I shot it with a bowling ball cannon,

thumb_up thumb_down +20

A thought for the day: Life is like a game of chess. In the constant struggle for power, control and safe positions it makes no difference whether one plays white or black. As long as everything is planned and one stays a few moves ahead, everything will work out. Just don't annoy the queen, or she may send some very irate knights to fork you or a bishop to flank you. [L]

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What is square, brown, and smells funny? A box with a dead body in it.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What starts with a J, and burned in the oven? My Jumbalaya, i left it in for too long...

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Why was Cinderella so bad at ball? Isn't that sexist, making assumptions about Cinderella's sports capability when you have never seen her play sports before (because she is a fictional character) and then asking why this is true when you have no proof that it is in fact true? But I would guess the correct answer is (if she is bad at ball in the first place) that she never played ball before. Think about it. Why did you have to ask this question at all? Isn't it obvious?

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Why wouldn't joey pay attention in class? Because he was being raped by a grizzly bear.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

why did the girl stop laughing? there was nothing to laugh about.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Why did the black guy have a bunch of marihuana? He was the owner of a shop that sold it for medical purposes.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

So I have an idea that will solve both world population and hunger problems! I call it the Omni-Abortion law. The idea is that all babies must be aborted and then eaten. Progressive, right?

thumb_up thumb_down +20

A turtle walks into a bar. The bar tender says "what will it be?" the turtle doesnt reply because its a turtle and the bar tender is sent to a mental hospital for talking to turtles.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

jack and jill went up the hill to get a bucket of water. jack fell down and broke his ankle and neck severely. jack and jill were taken away from their parents by child services, and their parents are charged for child endangerment and child labor.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What does it mean when the drummer drools out of both sides of their mouth? That they've may have had a stroke and you should immediately call 911.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What's a vampire's favorite dessert? Vampire's don't exist What's Helen Keller's favorite dessert? Helen Keller doesn't exist

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What did muscleman say to his dad? You know who else is my dad? MY MOM!

thumb_up thumb_down +20

6 in every 9 people find a dirty reference in every joke. This statistic is in fact false, as 5 in 9 people actually find a dirty reference.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Wanna hear a dirty joke? A guy in mud.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

why did the baby fall down the stairs? i pushed it.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What do you call a blind guy in a library? Kevin. Unless his name isn't Kevin.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

My grandmother just called to tell me she was dying................. to have sex with me.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 cantaloupe.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops