How many licks does it take to got to the Tootsie Roll center of a Tootsie Pop? 357

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A guy walks into a bar and orders a beer. There is a frog in his beer.

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A man walks into a Library.... And asks for a book.

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A- Knock knock. B- Who's there? A- The interrupting doctor. B- The interrupt- A- You have cancer.

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Roses Are Red, Violets Are Blue, He gave me AIDS, And I gave them to you!

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That akward moment when you tell a person you like them and they don't respond.

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How do you leave a jackass in suspense? I'll tell you later.

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I used to know what alzheimers was

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Q.-What's the difference between broccoli and a dead moose? A.-Yes.

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A Muslim walks into a bar, and has a pint of lager because he has chosen to integrate into his host country's culture. He then leaves without incident.

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What starts with F and ends with U-C-K? Firetruck

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Why does the Gay guy have a bell on his bike? Because its the only way his blind dog can follow him.

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What do the Irish do on their birthdays? Eat birthday cake and sing happy birthday

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Question: why did the pilot crash the plane? Answer: because the pilot was a loaf of bread

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Why did the chicken cross the road? There must have been something that peaked her interest.

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Why did Helen Keller's dog run away Because no dog likes being called "hurrrrdhjkdhjsaklhdkhjkddssaduyiwqkhdbewcjk"

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What do you get when Justin Bieber mates with a beaver? Nothing, the species are too genetically different to produce offspring

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why did the little girl scream?She was afraid of clowns and hated small cars running around a tent at 6 o'clock at night

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What do you call a mexican who works at a landscaping business? A hard working man who is trying to provide money for his family

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To rape the hen.

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Why did the black man kill himself? Because he had a very serious case of depression brought on by his recent divorce

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What's big and white and can't climb trees? A mattress

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How many blondes does it take to change a light bulb? One. Unless she's particularly short, then she may need to get a friend, who may or may not be blonde, to help by holding the ladder.

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There's a redhead, a brunette and a woman with green hair walking down the street. A man asks them how they all came to have such beautiful and vibrant hair color. The redhead smiles, runs a hand through her hair and replies "It's natural!" The brunette smiles, runs a hand through her hair and replies "It's natural!" The woman with green hair blows her nose, and replies "It isn't natural, I'm rebelling against society's conformist ideals. Also I was not loved enough as a child." She has a cold.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops