What did the dying man say to his friends? Nothing. He had no friends.

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Whats worse than getting broken into by a robber? Looking at Obama

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roses are red violets are blue i have AIDS i'm about to die

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Did you know diarrhoea is genetic? It is a side effect of Polycystic Kidney Disease.

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Shit on her face

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How many blonde chicks does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Two. One to set the house on fire, and the other to call 119.

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I'm a vegan thats why I am still a Virgin.

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What do you say to seduce a woman? Is that a mustache? WTF!

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What does a baby sound like being cooked in the microwave. I don't know I was to busy masterbating.

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Kid: Mom I'm gonna dig a hole all the way to China! Mom: That's sweet but it's impossible dear. You'll get to tired after awhile to go any farther. Also, by any chance you did dig really deep, you would melt and die if you got the the center because the magma will kill you when you get to it. Alright son? Kid: What?

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What does a black kid get from Christmas? a blunt

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I took my father out last night. We went to the Olive Garden.

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A black man, an asian man, and a gay man walk into a bar. What do they do? They mourn the loss of their dead friend.

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Why was the teacher having sex with her pupils? Because it was 2145 and that kind of shit is common then

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In my country we don't swim, we drown.

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whats the best thing about life? whatever the best thing about life happens to be!

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Q: whats funnier than watching a black man and a midget fight? A: anything technically, your opinion

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Why did the rooster cross the road? To go play with the other roosters.

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Q. Why didn't bob go to work today? A. I killed his family.

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Your mother is so morbidly obese that she greatly exceeds the necessary recommended serving sizes of each meal.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Start running Cuz ima F*** you Runn Forest Runn! Jubie

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Roses are blue Violets are unicorns This doesn't make sense Refrigerator

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What is E.T. short For? So he can fit on ship

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A construction worker walks into a bar. Lucky he was wearing his hard hat.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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