A horse walks into a bar. "Why the long face?" the bartender asks. The horse kills everyone in the bar and stampedes the other horses into town.

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Have you ever just woken up one day and thought, "I don't wanna wear pants today."

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what do you call afish and a cat? a catfish

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A man in a car turned left at the end of his road. Then he proceeded .1 miles and turned left again, as his GPS instructed him.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Schizophrenia.

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Guy One: Guess what? Guy Two: What? Guy One: I don't know, that's why I asked you.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's wife? No. Oh don't worry then.

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What happed when the homeless shelter went out of business? -Everyone went hungry and died.

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-Hey cute blonde! -I'm not blonde.. -Nor are you cute.

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A wild bear walks into a bar, grabs a drink and looks at the man next to it. The man then wakes up from a dream and gets ready for work.

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What's the difference between a sack of dead babies and my cousins? Nothing.

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Why do things made by Glen taste so good? Because he has mastered the cream

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What's black and white and red all over? The newspaper classified section after a man has abandoned long, futile job hunt. He has crossed out all the potential jobs with red ink. He was laid off due to the downturn in the economy and will now have to get food stamps, which is very embarrassing for a man who has worked to support his family his entire life.

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Why did the man cross the street? He just wanted to .. i don't see why not, i mean he could have gotten ran over by a train on a road but who knows he could have been run over by a turtle!

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knock knock whos there i dont know. go look

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Have you ever had Ethiopian food?? Neither have they...

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What do you find at a black guys yard sale? A bunch of reasonably priced items since he comes from a low income household.

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Why didn't the skeleton go to the party? Because skeletons don't get invited to parties because they are the remains of something that is dead and that would be a very ood thing to have at a party.

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Weegee weegee weegee weegee weegee weegee weegee weegee weegee weegee weegee

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Why did the eskimo drag the seal into the igloo? Because the whale wouldn't fit.

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An englishman, an irishman amd a scotsman were walking down the street. What a fine example of unionism

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How come Helen Keller didn’t scream when she fell off the cliff? Because at 19 months she contracted an illness that left her blind and deaf and therefore never learned to properly use her vocal cords

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i have a story to tell u!!! oh s*** i forgot!

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Knock knock. I have a doorbell...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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