What is Kanye West's favorite type of sea-food? Lobster Bisque with a side of french fries.

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You're walking down a street and you see a man struggling to open a door, what do you do? Whatever you feel like doing.

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Why is there no Asprin in the rainforest? Because it's financially viable to sell pharmesuticals in the vast, unpopulated rainforest.

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How did Sarah Palin see Russia from her house? She didn't.

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A man walks into a bar and sees a man with a big orange head. The man asks the bartender, "Why does that guy have a big orange head?" The bartender replies," If you buy him a beer, maybe he'll tell you." So the man buys a beer and gives it to the man with the big orange head and asks why he has a big orange head. The man says, "One day I found a genie and my first wish was to be the richest man in the world, my second wish was to be married to the most beautiful woman in the world, and for my third wish, I told the genie,'Ya know, why don't you give me a big orange head."

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Two muffins are baking in an oven. One of them says, "Man, it sure is hot in here." and the other muffin replies, "Yep." They later die a horrid and painful death as their flesh gets burned into a nice golden brown crisp.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, my dick is hard, and it's cumming for you.

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what did i do after u pinched me? i killed everyone

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How do you make a baby stop crying?you scream at it and throw it at wall

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Knock knock Who's there? Nobody Oh, ok

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ok when a fat person say he on a diet i said your on a sea food diet what evert you see you eat now get back to school John f kennedy students

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Who is buried in Grant's Tomb? DeShawn

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Q. What's cold and has no feelings? A. A pole

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Women's Rights

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I'm Polish.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

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What's worse than finding the Holocaust in your apple? Nothing

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what do u call a newspaper boy on brake? your uncle because hes broke and struggling with income.

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Q:Why didn't the Mexican get out of the box? A:Because he liked it in the box.

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how do you know when you've had too much to drink? . . . when you're dead.

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How many tortoises does it take to change a light bulb? One. Just don't expect it to be done quick.

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What did the fruit say when it was about to be sliced in half? Nothing, fruits cannot talk, duh.

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If Spongebob lives in Bikini Bottom, Where is Bikini Top?

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Why did the boy fail the test? He had down syndrome.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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