What is pink and fuzzy? Pink fuzz

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What does a penguins wear on it's feet? Nothing penguins are incapable of wearing foot wear, also they do not have feet they are called 'flippers'.

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Where did Suzie go after the explosion? Everywhere.

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The man goes to the doctor after just losing his job because his company went under because of the econmic crisis. His house is being foreclosed because without the money from his job he can't afford to pay for his house. His girlfriend also just left him because of recent conflicts about money and she was looking forward to having a family and with him jobless it was just out of the question. Man:"Doctor I could really use some good news" Doctor:"You have aids"

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Two Scientologists walk into a bar. For $5,000 you can hear the rest of this joke.

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What is small, yellowy-white and emits a kind of cheesy smell? A lump of cheese

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A: Why do you look like a dog? B: Idk.

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The boy gets shot in the face, he then dies of childhood obesity.

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How do you stop a train? You stand in front of it.

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Yo mama is so fat that she has to eat low calorie foods because she wants to lose weight.

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Little Johnny walked into class one day. The teacher announced their would be a pop-quiz on the declaration of independence. Johnny passed. (ic3)

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An eleven year old boy walks into a bar... he is searching for his father, who has a known alchol problem, and has been missing for five days.

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why did the black guy where orange shoes? Because he likes orange.

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Q: What's worse than ten babies tied to ten trees? A: One baby tied to ten trees.

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Name three similarities between racism and sexism I, S and M

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Until further notice Penn State's take your child to work day has been canceled.

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Why is a cookie like a jellyfish? Because it has no bones. (Contributed by my 4-year old boy)

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. ( to heaven )

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How many squirrels does it take to screw out a light bulb? None because squirrels lack the strength and mind set to screw out a light bulb.

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A Jew and a Neo-Nazi meet in a bar. They put aside their differences and enjoy a few rounds of drinks.

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Why did the blonde woman decide to get plastic surgery? Because she was self-conscious and unhappy with the way she looked.

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why dont black people celebrate thanksgiving? kfc is closed on holidays

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven. The first one turns to the second, and says nothing, because muffins can't talk. They then both die because the temperature in the oven was 370 degrees.

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How many Americans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Well thats a stupid question, just one.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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