what did the little girl with cancer get for christmas? cancer

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What happens when you take a break from reality? Nothing, it's impossible, unless you live in a virtual world.

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven. The first one turns to the second, and says nothing, because muffins can't talk. They then both die because the temperature in the oven was 370 degrees.

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How many squirrels does it take to screw out a light bulb? None because squirrels lack the strength and mind set to screw out a light bulb.

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Why did it take Da Vinci so long to paint the Sistine Chapel? Because it was painted by Michelangelo.

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How many Americans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Well thats a stupid question, just one.

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A Jew and a Neo-Nazi meet in a bar. They put aside their differences and enjoy a few rounds of drinks.

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What did the fat kid get for Christmas? Diabetes......

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Why did the blonde woman decide to get plastic surgery? Because she was self-conscious and unhappy with the way she looked.

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What do you call a bunch black people falling off a cliff? A mudslide! What do you call a bunch of white people falling off a cliff? An avalanch!

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What did the duck say to the Pope? Quack.

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why dont black people celebrate thanksgiving? kfc is closed on holidays

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Until further notice Penn State's take your child to work day has been canceled.

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Why is a cookie like a jellyfish? Because it has no bones. (Contributed by my 4-year old boy)

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What is the way to a man's heart? Through his stomach. With a knife. Then then go up a little.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. ( to heaven )

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Q: If your 17 year-old-daughter is a drug addict, how many cartwheels are you going to have to do to make it to Georgia? A: The French Revolution, because your grandmothers facebook shows an 11 year-old selling Concords to a green alien, which can only mean that over 600 people watch pórn daily.

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What's worse than finding out that your dog has worms? Finding out that you have worms.

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Excuse me, do you have any gnats? Yes, plenty. Thank you

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roses are red violets are green id love to flick owen cliffords mams bean

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What's 9 + 10 19 AB

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Why did Jill fall off the swings? -Because she had no arms. Knock Knock? --Who's there? Not Jill. What did Jill get for Christmas? -What? I don't know. She couldn't open it.

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KANE TUCKER HAS A CHODE THE SIZE OF HIS FINGER NAIL

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Two girls are in a car together. The one in the drivers seat is texting while driving. The girl in the passengers seat notices this and tells her the she should put it away in case of a risk of a collision. She apologizes and puts it away and the two of them drive to the store unharmed and continued their normal day.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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