Why did they serve Swiss cheese at the church? It was lunchtime.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Obesity runs in your family. To bad no one runs in your family.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why did the blackman fall off the bike? Because he stole it.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

catastrophic anthropogenic global warming

thumb_up thumb_down +13

So a baby seal walks into a club...

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What do I have in common with your mum? We're in the same bed right now.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why did the girl with a striped ball fall over? She was a victim of a drive-by shooting.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

knock knock whos there? jew jew who ? jew son o a b**** ? (aimed at ight wing racist jews)

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Whats worse than being fat? Being Rebecca Black

thumb_up thumb_down +13

How does Helen Keller play the piano? With one hand.. She needs the other hand to sing.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Whats green and fuzzy and will kill you if it falls out of a tree? A pool table

thumb_up thumb_down +13

what do you call a dumb blonde with no arms? Her name because she will not respond to anything else

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What does an elephant and a grape have in common? One of them is purple.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Kid- "Where do babies come from?" Mom- (commits suicide)

thumb_up thumb_down +13

what did the super popular, beautiful girl say to her stalker? i dont know, i wasnt the stalker.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why do you call a person who spits in your cheeseburger? A mean person

thumb_up thumb_down +13

knock knock whos there? aids aids who? aids aids who? i dont go away

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why aren't there any black flesh-colored bandages? Good question.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

what do u call blue fluff? blue fluff

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why did Suzy fall off the swing? As Suzy neared the ground while swinging, her foot caught a small hole in the swingset's pebble foundation, and the power of Suzy's momentum along with the sudden stop of Suzy's swing forced Suzy to fly forward off of the swing. Suzy, seeing the silliness of her mistake, laughed it off, and tried to get back up. She quickly realized that her leg had snapped in half. Suzy will never walk again.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Q: How many dwarfs does it take to change a light bulb? A: 1 or 2. One to change the light bulb and maybe another one to guards the staircase for the safety of the first one when the ceiling is too high (Wich happens almost every time because they are dwarfs.)

thumb_up thumb_down +13

5 little monkeys jumping on the bed 1 fell off and broke it's skull. Momma told the doctor and the doctor said,"Your a bad mom."

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What's worse than finding a Worm in your Apple? being Mauled to death.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Two scientists are experimenting with sulfuric acid. One scientist says to the other, "Did you see the new intern?" In the process of turning to face the first scientist, the second scientist knocks the beaker over and spills sulfuric acid all over the first scientist's hand. The first scientist writhes in pain as the second scientist rushes to find a strong base to neutralize the burn. After a few minutes, the first scientist is rushed off to the emergency room and suffers from some serious chemical burns.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops