Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? Neither has he.

nathan your cats dead now...well hopefully

Knock, knock. Who's there? Me, your friend George! You don't remember me! Oh. Sorry. I'm kidding. I'm a robber.

Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

How do you make someone laugh? Tell them this joke.

What do you call a fake noodle An impasta

Why did the boy fall? He got tackled by a man that was 400 pounds.

A Jew, an Irishman and a Russian walk into the bar and the bartender says, "Get the Hell out."

Your mother is so fat because she inherited poor genes and dietary habits from her own parents.

whos a sick fuck? jake morris

A guy walks up to his boy and tells him, "Hey, if you don't stop masturbating you'll go blind." The boy says, "Who are you? Your not my father."

WTF THINKING: "If you are going trough hell go back to where the path to hell began just get the fuck out of there you stupid dumbass muddaf0cker" "If you feel life is pushing you five steps back for each one you go forward, just turn your fucking back to your goal and you will get there in no time" "Never ever ever ever ever give up" -Fucking inspiring when you just give up after a certain number of "evers" "IT IS BETTER TO REIGN IN HEAVEN THAN TO SERVE IN HEAVEN!" "I forgot the rest" Nero the ONLY moralman (Fuck Neronism and they copying my shit, I am the only psychopath animal theRAPIST in town! (Female animals only, you think I am a pervert or something? Be ashamed you perverted deviant!)

Knock Knock. Who's there? Charles. Charles who? It's your brother Charles. I came straight here from the doctor. I was just diagnosed with stage 4 testicular cancer.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the monkey

What Do you call a black priest? Holy shit!

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead

What's the difference between a red shirt and a blue shirt? one is red and one is blue

What's black and blue and hates sex? The unfortunate child in a pedophile's basement who the police have yet to find.

What's worse than finding a worm on your apple? Trench foot on your eyebrow.

What do you call a guy with a rubber toe? . . . . . . . Roberto

What's worse than dropping an ice-cream cone? A dead baby. What's worse than a dead baby? Two dead babies. What's worse than two dead babies? The holocaust. What's worse than the holocaust? Dropping two ice-cream cones.

if your having trouble coming through the back door, try a Butterfinger

Why did the blond girl walk into the street pole? Because she wasn't paying attention.

Why did the deaf man attend the music concert? He was invited by friends and wasn't doing anyhting else that evening.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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