"Knock knock," said the guy about to deliver a knock knock joke.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Roses are red, Violets are microwaves, I have amnesia, Roses are red.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What's John Lennon doing these days? Decomposing.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What did the man say to the ugly woman? Your face makes my penis soft.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Because it was sick and tired of all the repeated monkey jokes and commited suicide and preceded to fall out of the tree.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Why did the student fall asleep during class? He was very tried from staying up too late.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Face...tastes like chicken!

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Why did Carl the cat die? he didnt. he's still alive.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Which is rather deceiving, Considering that the name 'violet' should naturally insinuate that the object it is describing is violet as well. Violet as a color is generally a deep shade of purple. Therefore, shouldn't the aforementioned plant, the 'violet', be violet in color as opposed to the blue color that is most widely accepted by the general populous?

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Why was the boy laughing at Sally? Because Sally was a man

thumb_up thumb_down +19

(waving left hand) Why doesn't Queen Elizabeth wave with this hand? Why? Because this is my hand.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Two black guys were walking down a street to meet up a local drug dealer. Turns out the black guys were undercover cops who arrested the drug dealer and both recieved awards for finding the criminal.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Bill went into a store and bought a bagel. However, after eating it, he realizes he meant to buy a doughnut. He tells the cashier that he meant to order a doughnut, and asks for his money back. The cashier says no and the man leaves.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Q:Why did the little girl jump in the pool and drown? A:because she didn't know how to swim

thumb_up thumb_down +17

what happened when the shoe turned into a shoe.......... nothing, it was a raisin

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust. What's worse than the holocaust? Finding two worms in your apple.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Where did the RICH black man go to? His home

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Your mother's so ugly she has low self-esteem

thumb_up thumb_down +17

yo momma is so poor that she may not be abe to accumulate the right amount of revenue necessary for your college funding.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

How come Susie fell off of the swing? -because I hit her with an axe Coolhsoj

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What does an elephant and a grape have in common? One of them is purple.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

2 drums and a cymbal fall off a cliff. Bu dum, cshhhh.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

How many black people does it take to for there to be a murder? None. A murder is a group of crows,not black people.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops