Seriously, I am going to tell you, but you know, what would you have preferred that it was if you could choose, I am kinda insecure about these things, and people can read these messages so...

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what happened when Bob told a joke? Joe laughed.

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A mushroom walks into a bar. The bartender says "We don't serve your kind here." The mushroom says, "What? I'm a fungi." The bartender replies, "Exactly. That's a health hazard. The health department already gave two strikes and if I lose the bar my wife will divorce me."

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I touch myself at night.

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A black man walks into a bar. The bartender asks him to leave.

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Knock Knock Opens door because they were expecting visitors

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did you hear about the little girl who won first place in her school's spelling bee? she was hit by a bus

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Q:What do you call a black priest? A: A great quality volunteer at a local church.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? No reason.

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Why did the man scream when his dog ran into the room? Because he was afraid of dogs.

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What do you call 10,000 lawyers jumping off a cliff? Mass suicide

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Did I tell you about when I hit a cat with my car? No, what happened? I hit a cat.

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Yo momma's so stupid... she scored poorly on on the SAT, failed to get into a good college, worked at a walmart and lived an otherwise mundane life.

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Men

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Roses are red, violets are blue, you have a disease, it's called cancer.

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What's cold, tired, wet, and starving? A girl up at 4:00 am that just came out of a cold shower.

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#Last Christmas I gave you my heart #And as far as I know #The transplant was a complete sucess #And you have recovered from your operation #And are now well again #This year to save me from tears #I'll donate my kidneys

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Why did the bear turn red? Because he was emBEARessed. Nah just kidding, a hunter shot him.

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Q: How many black guys does it take to black top a driveway? A: I can't give you a definitive answer unless I know the area to be covered, the thickness of material to be applied, and the capabilities of each individual working that particular day.

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their was a black man in my family tree hes still hanging on

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Yo mama is so short, she has trouble reaching the top shelf.

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A man and wife were having a vacation when suddenly the man falls to the floor and starts having a seizure. The woman screams "Oh my God, is there a doctor in the house?!" Then a doctor appears and helps the man with the appropriate method of handling a seizure. The doctor says everything is going to be okay.

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Once upon a time there was a small poor boy in a small German village. Her was name Smalls. Later he found out that he had to go back to Virginia because of their family then she got milk and went to the play that night like he was planning, and it was probably a problem with the clutch or transmission. It was fine because Smalls was 64 years old.

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A man was walking down the street in the pitch black dark and he looked into a pitch black dark window. What did he see? Pitch black dark people.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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