What do you call it when an old person cuts off their fingers? Dementia

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A red-head, a brunette and a blond are trapped on an island 10km from civilization. The red-head swims 1.5km's, but is to tired, so she swims back to the island. The brunette swims 3km's, but is too tired, so she swims back to the island. After watching the first two fail, the blond evaluates the situation and decides that she does not possess the swimming ability required to reach the 5km point (At which swimming back to the island becomes equally as far as swimming to civilization), and instead stays on the island and creates a signal fire out of bits of debris scattered on the island, getting rescued within hours.

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If i had a dollar for every time Lindsay Lohan Crashed a vehicle......i would be rich

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2 doctors are talking to each other? -Dead? -Dead.

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Why did the black man drown? Because he didn't wait 30 minutes after eating.

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What did the deaf, dumb, blind kid with two stump arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer

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Why did the bartender kick out the three jews at midnight? Because the bar closes at 11.

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why was 6 afraid of 7? because seven is a murdering sociopath

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What do you call an Asian guy doing homework? A student

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The horse replies, "My wife is dying of terminal brain cancer."

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Wanna hear a joke? Me too.

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What's the difference between an elephant and a plum? Their color. What did Tarzan say when he saw the elephants coming over the hill? Here come the elephants over the hill. What did Jane say when she saw the elephants coming over the hill? Here come the plums over the hill. She was color blind.

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How many dead babies can you fit in a bathtub? Well, it all depends on the size of the bathtub.

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you're so stupid, you have trouble understanding what you read, like the newspaper, for example

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Q-How do you kill an elephant? A- An elephant gun Q- How do you kill a blue elephant? A- A blue elephant gun Q- How do you kill a red elephant? A- Strangle it until it turns blue then use a blue elephant gune Q- How do you kill a purple elephant? A- Don't be ridiculous purple elephants don't exist

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Two men walk into a bedroom. Did I mention they were gay?

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Why did the cow cross the road? He probably saw a delicious looking patch of grass on the otherside.

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what is the difference between my girlfriend and my black pet bunny .... i raped my black pet bunny

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A:why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side =D B:...i dont think you fully grasp the concept of an anti joke yet...smh -.-

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what's worse then a blowjob?

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Yo mama is so stupid that see should really be concerned with furthering her education in a four-year university

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10inch nice

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Knock, knock Who's there? It's me Me who? Just open your damn door funny guy it's freezing out here

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Anti-Joke is a sticky wicket.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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