Why did the old lady talk to a tree? She had Alzheimer's and was going to die.

What's better than winning a million dollars? Winning 2 million dollars!

What is big, red and eats rocks? A big red rock eater

What's the best way to get high without doing drugs? Jump.

Why can't Bin laden drive because he's dead

If pro- is good or favored and con- is bad, then why do people favor the constitution and stay away from prostitution?

Why is the old lady crying? I threw a fridge at her.

Why did the giraffe fall over? Because I shot it with a bowling ball cannon,

How many times has Belle Ahern been hit in the mutt 76. Stupid slut

Why did Billy kill Joey? Joey had sex with Billy's wife... and Billy wanted revenge.

-It ain't over till the fat lady sings -she just did -oh, I guess it's over then -k

Your big dick.

Q: What do you call an underground train full of professors? A: It's very unlikely that the passengers on an underground train would consist entirely of professors, unless it was a special service booked solely for the attendees of highly specialised lectures which required each audience member to have completed a professorship.

What did the black kid get on his report card? Math: C- English: D+ Social Studies: C+ Gym:A+ Science: D- N.P.P.

What do you say to a girl with two black eyes? Nothing you haven't already said twice.

How did the fat man survive the plane crash? He didn't, he died like everyone else!

how do you make a plumber sad? tell him to pull up his pants

What did the black boy get for Christmas? A bike his parents bought him.

If there's somethin' strange in your neighborhood Who ya gonna call 911

Knock knock. USE THE DOORBELL!

A dyslexic man walks into a bra. He was at Victoria's Secret and he wasn't watching where he was going.

Why did the little boy cross the road? He didnt, he got hit by a car and died

Why was the blackman fired from his job? Beacuse he was late too many times which was unacceptable.

What do you call a black person flying a plane? A pilot.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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