Why did Isaac run from his mother? She tried to kill him because God said so. Christianity.

A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

What's big fat and hairy? Peter

It was Jimmy's 18th bday so his parents let him have the house to himself. He ate shrooms, fucked his turtle, then had his dick bitten off.

Whats circular and black? a black circle.

Why did the chicken cross the road the chicken is blind and deaf and happened to wander into the street and got hit by a car and was instantly killed

Three men stumble upon an ancient lamp in the desert. They sell it to a museum and split the profits evenly.

What is green and drives around in the desert and is not a tank? secretly a tank

Whats the difference between Osama and Obama? The S is replaced with a B.

Why did the chicken cro- Oh. He got run over.

have you seen stevie wonder's harmonica? neither has he.

Q: What did Batman say to Robin before they got into the car? A: Get in the car.

Knock, knock. Who's there? "Dwane!" I don't know any Dwane. Perhaps you have the wrong address. "Oh. Sorry to have bothered you!"

What do an owl and a squirrel have in common? They can both fly! Except for the squirrel.

Roses Are Red, Violets Are Blue, He gave me AIDS, And I gave them to you!

I have a horse.

Why couldnt hellen keller drive because she was a women

I like my coffee like my women. Without a penis. -Rivrawr

Why doesn't your dad want to have sex with your mom? Because my penis is already in her vagina, thus your dad's inability to place his penis in her vagina.

What did the construction worker bring with him to work? - Tools

A man was feeling sick and decided to go and see a doctor. He saw the doctor and then went home. He wasn't feeling any better so he decided to get checked-out by the doctor.

are you from tennesse? cuase you sure look like a f u c k e d up redneck

Why did the boy get teased? Because his name was spelt wrong (k)urtis

How many Mexicans eating a Taco in California does it take to fix a lightbulb? 1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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