What did Jim do after the police gave him a ticket? He followed them home and used their children's limbs to rape them.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

how does chuck norris eat an apple Just like every other person

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Q: Who was shot 50 years ago? A: Abraham Lincoln was shot 50 years ago! (=

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Yo mama's so fat, I gave her a compliment because we should embrace body acceptance.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

What's green and has wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

A black man, an asian man, and white man walk into a bar. Not that out of the ordinary since America is a melting pot.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

i was born with 99 medical problems, and the difficulty to count till 100.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Why do black people always sit in the back of the bus? There aren't any available seats in the front.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

how many dumbasses does it take to make a kushagra

thumb_up thumb_down -31

hi

thumb_up thumb_down -31

why was the little girl crying? Because her family was dead

thumb_up thumb_down -31

A guy, arriving at the pearly gates of Heaven, asks St. Peter "Why did I die? Why me." St. Peter replies: "You died the same way everyone does. Lack of oxygen to the brain."

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Michael Jackson walks into a bar. Everyone runs out, screaming, "AH, a dead guy is walking!"

thumb_up thumb_down -31

So you keep your knowledge sharp do you? When it comes to hypnosis and such?

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Then help me understand Nero, people had the free and legal right to decide to be a part of our, or your society if you prefer, where has that option gone now? Where is the people that choose to believe in their own potential and in the one of their equals? Today we live in a society where its basically pop culture to dislike oneself, where it is considered narcissism to like oneself, and you know that we have both been affected, while those we considered allies before, have joined the same people that branded us evil.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

A baby walks into a bar, not long before it leaves out of the bar.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

How do you know what to order at a Creole restaurant? Ask the waiter, they are usually familiar enough with the menu to make an educated recommendation.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

a blonde takes 1 hour to swim 100m of breaststroke.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

What is the difference between menstrual blood and sand? You can't gargle sand.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person who adheres to the Jewish faith and claims a cultural or ancestral connection to the Jewish people, and a pizza is an oven-baked, flat, disc shaped bread usually topped with tomato sauce and mozzarella and then a selection of meats, depending on taste and culture.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Yo mama is so stupid... She didn't graduate high school.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

His Royal Highness was hunting in the forest accompanied by his squires and hunting dogs. A man, screaming, ran wildly out of the brush and addressed the hunting party. He said, "DON'T SHOOT! I AM NOT A MOOSE!! PLEASE DO NOT SHOOT!!!!" The king calmly raised his rifle to his eye and fired, hitting the man in the temple, and instantly killing him. A squire frantically turned to the king and said "Sire! Why did you kill this man?! He CLEARLY said he was not a moose!" The King replied "Oh! I thought he said he WAS a moose..."

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Q: Why did'n the dirty man jump into the shower? A: Because he spotted the potential danger to jump into a slippery shower and proceeded with caution.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

What did a man say to the woman with two black eyes? "Are you okay? Here, let me take you to the hospital." The woman is now healing nicely.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops