Why can't Michael Jackson work at a boy scouts camp? Because he's dead.

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What did the duck say to the Pope? Quack.

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What did the boy with no legs get for his birthday? A bike

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why was the black guy smelly? because his white friend threw him in a dumpster

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Joker: Why so serious Man: My mom and dad just got hit by a car, and you just stabbed my friend in the face with a pencil. Joker: Oh well im sorry to hear that.

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What happened when the boy got caught with his hand in the cookie jar? He gets shot in the face by Santa.

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why did the kid sit alone at lunch? he had no friends

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Why did jasmine drop her shopping? And no its not because she did'nt have arms infact she did have arms she just did'nt have any hands

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. It was hit by a fridge halfway through walking.

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Why is sally sad her parents abuse her daily

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What does Chuck Norris order at McDonalds? A Big Mac with a large fry and drink.

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What did the aborted fetus say to the recycling bin? Nothing because it isn't capable of speaking, and it was in the dumpster

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Where did Suzie go after the explosion? Everywhere.

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What's the difference between an elephant and a grape? They're both purple. Except for the elephant.

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What do you call a black man on the moon? Another successful moon landing by NASA in which the African-American astronaut went on a successful moon walk.

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Three people walk into a bar. Eight people follow them. They all go back to Bob's house, except Anna, Jimmy, and Joe. TImes the amount of people going to Bob's house by four. Thats how many people get arrested at the end of the night. How many people aren't arrested? Do you even know why you read this? Get a life and go to an actual bar, a party and get arrested.

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What has wheels and is green all over? Grass... I was just kidding about the wheels.

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JOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN WHAT'S THE ANSWER?! WHAT DO YAH MEAN YA DUNNO?!

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Where did Susie go after the explosion? I don't know: she was nowhere near the explosion at the time that it happened. She probably got up to use the bathroom.

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-Why was little Johnny sad? >Why? -Because he had a frog stapled to his forehead.

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How did the mom quiet her screaming baby? She threw it out the window.

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Why was the penguin popular? He cuts himself.

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I love pissing people off :P

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Why do ducks fly south for the winter? because its to far to waddle

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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