What is better than life? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Michael Vick walks into a pet shop. He buys a puppy and cares for it lovingly

thumb_up thumb_down -31

What did little Ben's mom give him for Christmas? Nothing. She died last month

thumb_up thumb_down -31

How many people with Alzheimer's does it take to screw in a lightbulb? To get to the other side.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

A man goes to the movies with his wife, two hours later they drive home and find their house just the way they left it.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

What do you call a black man driving a helicopter? Blackhawk down

thumb_up thumb_down -31

a man walks into the bar and say, OUCH!!

thumb_up thumb_down -31

why was the frog sad..... because it was stappled to the boys face

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Where do cows get cultured? They don't, they get slaughtered first.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Why was the black person playing hockey? Because he found an interest to the sport during his childhood years.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

What's green and has wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

What's hanging by a rope from the tree in my backyard? A tire swing.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Q:what do you do when a black guy is drowning A:you dont

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Why do giraffes have long necks? So they can reach higher, un-eaten leaves.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Your mom is so fat that she saw a school bus full of white children and , thought "I can hardly even remember a time when my body used to be slim." She now keeps track of her diet and exercises regularly,the result of this has been a weight loss of over 95 pounds.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Why did the dinosaurs go extinct? Because you touch yourself at night.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Why are soccer players sad? They couldn't play Football.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

A man and his friend walk into a bar. The first man said to the bartender "I'll have a H2O, please." His friend said "Yeah, I'll have a H2O too." The bartended wasn't an idiot and was aware that he was in a bar, not a science lab, and handed them both a bottle of H2O. His friend still died.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Why was the boy crying? His mother has terminal cancer, and his father does not have the financial stability to cover the cost of the surgery and keep up on house payments and buying clothes and food for the children. He will be living in a foster home in a matter of a week.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

why wont chin ever take his hat off because his head will be cold

thumb_up thumb_down -33

What did the man say to his wife before she made him a sandwhich? Do your job and make me a sandwhich.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

The average man ejaculates at 40mph, which is why its safer to hit a child at 30mph

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Boy: Hey girl if I had hand-cuffs, I’d lock myself to you right now! Girl: I would find that extremely creepy.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

What's 100 times worse that finding an worm in your Apple listening to Justin B. Sing! :-)

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops