You know how I know you're gay? Because you came out to your close family and friends, who were all very respectful and accepting.

What's worse than seven babies in a trashcan? Not much.

Guess what my dad got me for my birthday? NOTHING, he left my mom and I when I was a baby.

Roses are red, violets are blue, twilight is gay and Justi Bieber too.

why did benny go to the 4th grade school nurse? he had a massive erection.

Regarding the "I will violate you, your children and your parent if you thumb me red" comment belo. I had a green thumb, I know because I gave it to myself because I am awesome... Now I got none... I person that this this, I cannot wait to X-mas where I will be violating them all, tell them, and as thus remind you that this was their Christmas present from you... Your friendly r*pist neighborhood Moral Man: Yes, I am your neigbor... I cant wait for slot number 24 on my christmas calendar... There is a picture of you and your family... Yummy!

Q: What did zero say to the eight? A: Nice belt

How do you know when some one is a complete dick? When they hit the prestige buttom in Black Ops when your taking a dump. N.P.P.

Two cows in a field. One said, "Moo!" the other said, "Shit! i was going to say that."

how do you get a giraffe in a refrigerator? open the door and put him in.

Three men walk into a bar, the bartender asks why are you three men in here? The men look confused and suddenly leave

What time is it when an elephant sits on your fence? three-thirty.

You in love with me? Like platonic? Fine, we will move operations elsewhere, you really got to tell me who you are working for someday.

roses are red violets are blue holy sh*t slendermans behind you

i am writing this because i felt like it.

Why did the bald man die? Cancer.

Everybody has a penis! EVERY BODY! WHY can't feminists admit this obvious anatomical fact? Gahhhh!

Why was the black man eating fried chicken and watermelon? He was at home

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the chicken fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the monkey.

Q: Did you hear that Hollywood actress got stabbed last night? A: Really? Which one? Q: Reese.. um wither.. withersomething A: Witherspoon? Q: Yes. Her. She's in a critical condition.

What did the chicken say when it layed the square egg? Ouch.

Q. What do you call a retarted guy? A. Whatever his name happens to be

How do you scare Sarah Palin? You chase her around with a chainsaw while wearing a Jason mask.

What's green and runs through the forest? - A pack of cucumbers. What's wrong with that? - Cucumbers aren't pack animals.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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