Roses are red Violets are blue Im bad at making jokes And your a jew

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What did a Blond do in the Desert? She got lost after Falling of a flying carpet

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Q: Wgat do you call a black man's dead bodie? A: A corpse.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What's the diffence between a pieace of fried chicken and a Jew? A Jew wouldnt scream in a fryer.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

How much wood can a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood? The Holocaust

thumb_up thumb_down +11

roses are red, violets are blue, poems are stupid, refridgerator

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What did Bambi say to her mother when her mother was killed? Nothing. Bambi's a deer. Duh.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

A black man walks into a bar in an all white neighborhood. He has a couple of drinks, pays for them, and politely calls a taxi for a ride home.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why is Helen Keller a bad driver? Because her inability to see or hear makes her an extremely dangerous road hazard.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What do you say to a man with no legs at a bus stop.. How you getting on.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What's black an blue and doesn't like sex? The 8year old in my trunk.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Hi. P.S: You have aids. P.P.S: Purple penis pumpernickel pie puppets.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What's worst than losing a million dollars? Losing a plane. Whats worst than losing a plane? losing 239 people, a plane and a million dollars

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why was Sally in a wheelchair? Her abusive father beat her repeatedly with a rake.. Then as she crawled out the door to try and get help, the abusive father took his Dodge Ram and ran over her legs reapeatedly. Then began to slap her. Luckily, a vigilante saw the whole thing and slaughtered the father with an axe and carefully escorted Sally to the hospital. After a couple of weeks of beautiful and extraordinary care, Sally made a full recovery and was able to leave.. and all patients have to leave in a wheelchair

thumb_up thumb_down +11

How many Jews can you fit in a car? It really depends on the make and model of the car, as well as the relative size and weight of the people in question, but legally you can only have as many people in the car as there are seatbelts available for them.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Q: What's brown and rhymes with snoop? A: Dr. Dre

thumb_up thumb_down +11

How do you tell a bunch of Chinese people apart? Go up to each one and ask them their first and last names. The chances of any of them being the same is quite slim, giving each person their own identity.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

A man stumbles up to the only other patron in a bar and asks if he could buy him a drink. "Why of course," comes the reply. The first man then asks: "Where are you from?" "I'm from Ireland," replies the second man. The first man responds: "You don't say, I'm from Ireland too! Let's have another round to Ireland." "Of course," replies the second man. I'm curious, the first man then asks: "Where in Ireland are you from?" "Dublin," comes the reply. "I can't believe it," says the first man. "I'm from Dublin too! Let's have another drink to Dublin." "Of course," replies the second man. Curiosity again strikes and the first man asks: "What school did you go to?" "Saint Mary's," replies the second man, "I graduated in '62." "This is unbelievable!", the first man says. "I went to Saint Mary's and I graduated in '62, too!" About that time in comes one of the regulars and sits down at the bar. "What's been going on?" he asks the bartender. "Nothing much," replies the bartender. "The O'Kinly twins are drunk again."

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was involved in a homicide at the Children's Hospital resulting in death row right away and was involved in the killing of 12 other numbers on last Tuesday.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

pudding

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Where did Ben go after being hit by a high speed train? Underneath the train's wheels.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

what did the woman say? 'duhhh, i don't have a penis durr durr' (By the way, I'm trying to be not misogynistic, please let me know if you find this misogynistic in any way)

thumb_up thumb_down +9

what did the penguin say to the other penguin after they rolled down a hill, and fell into a pile of leaves then proceeded to go swimming, play basketball, go swimming again and then play ping pong and pool? nothing. penguins cant talk

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Helen Keller went to town, riding on a pony, stuck a feather in her hat and called it "NUuhHUhhuUUUuhhhuuuuumph!"

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops