A devout Christian dies. Peter winks as his soul passes through the impenetrable Gates of Heaven. Everyone is gay and– like, gay as in happy– Fags aren't allowed in Heaven.

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The asian parent's look at their child and say in an angry voice. "Y U NO DOCTOR." The kid was amazed how uneducated they were in english after living in america for 10 years.

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How do you get a baby out of the blender? Pour it

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what did the farmer do? plant

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her: what did your last slave die of? him: syphillis

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Where's my tractor?"

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whats brown and half eaten? yeah an easter egg that a parent has given to there son/daughter before dinner

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What did the kitten say to the ant? Nothing, it was dead. - Driiiftz

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Your friend is so gay he has consensual sex with other men, and enjoys it.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Seven was a psychopath

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Why could a fat man not do a barrel roll? He has already to many rolls.

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whats worse than the Holocaust....6 million Jews

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A husband said to his wife, "If you want to have sex, stroke my penis one time. If you don't want to have sex, just say so and I will respect your decision, though I may be disappointed."

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*knock knock* *knock knock * ? ? The man didnt answer because he died of a stroke

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Knock knock Who's there? You're You're who? YOU'RE MOM IN MY BED!!! (i know it sucks)

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What do you call cheese that isnt yours? Stolen cheese.

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Roses are red Heres something new Violets are violet not fucking blue

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What has eyes but can not see, and rolls everywhere it goes? A man who fought for your freedom and lost both his eyesight and legs in doing so. Have some respect.

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whats worse than getting bit by a tick. getting bit by a deer tick that as lyme disease.

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Q: What's worse than ten dead babies nailed to one tree? A: One baby nailed to ten trees.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 sodomized his whole family.;

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A blind man watches TV

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How many electricians does it take to screw in a light bulb? One.

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Why can't Stephen Hawking go to the moon? He can, it would require a great sum of money, and extensive anti-gravity training.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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