Q: What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor ? A: The holocaust

Q: How did the robber steal a laptop from best buy? A: With his hands

Why did Jimmy drop his ice cream? Because he was hit by a bus Knock Knock Who's there? Not Jimmy -thatcooltyguy

How many blondes does it take to screw a lightbulb? There's too little information to come up with a reasonable answer.

Roses are red Violets are blue I have 5 fingers and the middles for you

My mom was telling my brother how much it hurt when she stubbed her toe. He told her she should try child birth.

kid: dad! a kid called me gay today! dad: son, im 100% ok with u hurting that kid! kid: i cant! hes too cute.

the lemon was sweet.

Why did the family sue disney? Because at a meet and greet location mickey mouse shot their youngest in the heart.

Why did the koala fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second koala fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first koala. Why did the third koala fall out of the tree? He thought it was a game.

Wanna hear a clean joke? I took a bath with bubbles. Wanna hear a dirty joke? Bubbles is the girl next door.

Evil Witch: Hey Snow White, want an apple. Snow White: No thank you, I just ate, I'm good. Evil Witch: But its good! Snow White: No thanks, I'm good! Evil Witch: Ill put caramel on it!! Snow White: NO THANKS! Evil Witch: FINE!! The Evil Witch then pulled out an AK - 47 and violently murdered Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs.

What breaks when you give it to a baby? Its pelvis

Why did the squirrel fall out the tree? It was dead Why did the second squirrel fall out the tree? It was stapled to the first squirrel Why did the the third squirrel fall out the tree? Peer pressure Why did the fourth squirrel fall out the tree? It thought it was a game Why did the tree fall over? It thought it was a squirrel Why did the postman die? He got hit in the head by four squirrels and a tree

A Black Man Walks Into an Office For A Job Interview. The Meeting Goes Very And He Soon Has A Very Nice Steady Job.

Guy 1: What is long, hard and full of semen? Guy 2: A submarine. Guy 1: No, my penis.

roses are red violets are blue i done your mom and i do you too

What do you call an asian jumping off of a building? A suicide victim.

Why did the jewish family move? Their house burnt down. They lost everything and was tragic

Knock knock come in.

How did th-A fridge.

Roses are red, Violets are dead, I've climbed through your window, I'm under your bed.

Put chromosomes in advertising. Because you know, Sex Cells

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Why the long face?" The horse answers, "Because I'm an alcoholic."

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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