A grandma writes to her young grandson every day over e-mail with funny lines and pictures,He shows his parents a joke she sent him it reads- "A guy walks into a bar.. He says ouch" They then read on and call the police.They say "Son go to your room.. you're being stalked by a pedophile.. Your grandma has been dead since last year.. we are sorry"

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Your family is so fat that when their feet hit the ground, it recorded 9 on the richter scale, because they were launched at the Earth at close to the speed of light, and when you account for relativistic mass effects, the amount of energy that was displaced into the ground was tremendous

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A lady in a bank was asked by the clerk to round the sum she wanted to raise from her account. She rounded it several times, but the clerk continued to insist that the sum needs to be rounded. She left the bank confused, with a coupon consisting of completely rounded sum of 691, 88$. Next day she returned with a coupon with a rounded sum of 690,88$. The clerk asked again the lady to round the sum. The lady started helplessly to cry and said she had rounded is already with a harp, and couldn't make it round anymore, she even removed the sharp 1 from the sum.

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What did the fat man say when he saw the giant twinky on the billboard? I wish that twinky was real, because I am too poor to pay my bills, am getting audited, and cannot feed my four children on minimum wage.

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A lawyer walks into a bar, and due to the repercussions of severe head trauma was never able to do so again.

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Bob goes to the store and buys some food.

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Do you know whats funny? No do you know i was asking a question

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what you get time to go with? - a clock

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what is Rebecca black's favorite restaurant? Ruby Tuesdays

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? A vet.

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Have you heard about the Polish princess? There isn't one. The Polish monarchy was abolished in 1918.

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What do you call a girl who has recently been raped? Dead.

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What's brown and sticky? Some brown pigment mixed with something sticky like glue.

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Yo mama's so ugly, she has difficulty attracting a partner.

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What's the difference between Jews and pizza? One is an adherent to the religion of Judaism, and the other is a doughy bread topped with tomato sauce and cheese. They share virtually no similarities.

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while having sex, the boy asked, "how many ears do elephants have?" his father answered, "two"

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An anti-joke

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knock knock whos there I AM YOUR MOTHER!!!!

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What do a rabbit and a plum have in common? They're both purple expect the rabbit

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dylan wishes life was like cod. that way he would actually be able to do something cool

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Knock Knock. Who's there? ........ It turns out it was Helen Keller.

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How do you fit 1000 babies into a trashcan? You don't that would be wasteful! You Eat Them!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Jokes Ki Duniya

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Q: What do you call a pig with wings? A: Pigs don't have wings.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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