What's long, hard, and has come in it? A long, hardcovered book.

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Q: Whats about two feet in width and length with purple veins throbbing at the sides? A: A midget slowly dying of frostbite

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What is "race car" spelled backwards? rac ecar.

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What's worst than getting hit by a car. -Getting hit by a truck.

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Whats brown and sticky? - A brown stick.

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Fact: 100% of people who drink alcohol will die.

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Why did the young girl fall off her bike? Because somebody threw a fridge at her.

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What did the viking say to the alien? "Vad i namn av valhalla är en utlänning gör här?"

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why dont you hit a black kid on a bike? its probably your bike.

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Why did the mother stop breastfeeding her son? Because he was twenty five.

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knock knock whos there? aids aids who? aids aids who? i dont go away

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why couldn't sarah ride the bike? She had cerebral Palsy

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How hot was the blonde considering she was in Africa for the first time and it was 103 degrees, very

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What do you call a sober man driving a car? a designated driver

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Why did the man scream when his dog ran into the room? Because he was afraid of dogs.

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Why did Hitler kill himself He saw his gas bill

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Q. Whats blue and looks like a bucket? A. a blue bucket Q. whats green and looks like a bucket? A. a blue bucket in disguise.

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What did the widow get for mother's day? A miscarriage

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What did the banana say to the apple? Nothing, although on a deoxyribonucleic acid level, bananas are technically sharing 50% of their genes with us, humans, but yet still have the incapability to produce its own voice. In addition, apple can't talk either due to their lack of nerves, veins, arteries, and diaphragm, therefore bananas not apple cannot produce sound.

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a giraffe walks into a bakery, "can I have 101 brown loafs please?" the baker answers: "hmm I've got only 100 loafs is that ok too?" the giraffe says: "why the hell would I need a 100 loafs?!"

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Who gave Miley Cyrus her new haircut? Hellen Keller

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Grandma used to say "you only die once." Years later, I learned the wisdom behind those words.

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how did the fat man survive the plane crash? he didn't, he died like everyone else.

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Why couldn't Little Johnny read his 3rd grade novel? His was repeatedly stabbed in his eyes.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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