Q: If your 17 year-old-daughter is a drug addict, how many cartwheels are you going to have to do to make it to Georgia? A: The French Revolution, because your grandmothers facebook shows an 11 year-old selling Concords to a green alien, which can only mean that over 600 people watch pórn daily.

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Q: How many babies does it take to paint a wall? A: It depends on how hard you throw them.

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How do Chinese people name their kids? They could look up a baby-names book, consult their family history, or make one up

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Why is this anti-joke here? Because someone submitted it to this website.

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A Fairly ghetto African-American male and a Korean Merchant pass each other on the streets of L.A. two weeks after the Rodney King riots, what happens? The merchant nods his head to say hello to the African-American and the African-American male does the same and they both live out sucessful lives. By the way the African-American just got accepted to Harvard on a scholarship program.

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Gerald: Hey did you know I was named AFTER Abraham Lincoln? Gloria: Because he was born in the 1800's and you were born and named many years afterward? Gerald: Ah... I guess I emphasized that joke a little to much - I'm sorry this conversation happened

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Why are stand up comedians called stand up comedians? Because they are standing up while telling jokes, dumby.

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Where's the best place to gather black people to roleplay as prison victims for a documentary? Prison or the Graveyard.

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Why do hummingbirds hum? They don't realize how annoying it is.

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What did the black man get for christmas? A present.

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Pete and Repeat were on a boat. Pete jumped out, who was left? Pete, the boat blew up and instantly killed repeat

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3 guys are in a car crap manners and shut up.shut up is driving and crape falls out the window so manners goes and gets him. A cop pulls over shut up.he goes what's your name son?shut up.where's your manners boy?over there picking up crape.

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At 1:00AM, an old man is woken up by a knocking on the door. 'Knock knock' 'Who's there' 'An orange' The man opens the door to find a talking orange on his doorstep. The man remembers he has Schizophrenia and goes back to sleep.

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How many rich men does it take to screw in a light bulb? One, to hire an electrician to do it for him.

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why did the family get sick?? because i fucked a girl with a parsnip then sold the parsnip to a family with 4 small children

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how do you stop a baby from crawling in circles??????? you nail its other hand to the floor

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(Insert short question here) (Insert long semi-irrelevant answer here)

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*insert lame joke stolen from the top 10 jokes and act like it's original because I changed one word*

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Roses are red. Violates' are blue. Hitler is my homy.

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Why can't Chuck Norris divide by zero Because it's impossible.

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Whats the difference between an apple and a chicken? Many, many things

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Q: How to fit 10 babies in a suitcase? A: By blender Q: How to get the babies out of the suitcase? A: Using a straw.

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Barack Obama is a good president.

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What did one apple say to the other? Nothing, it is scientifically proven that apples can't talk.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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