What did the black fire-fighter do when the house caught fire? The heroic man ran inside and got every animal and person inside to the out side and then proceeded to extinguish the flames with his fire-extinguisher out, thus saving most of the families valuables. He was then awarded a raise in his salary for his heroic valor. Although any fire-fighter could have done this because of the hard work and dedication that is put into training. So really describing the race that this heroic man is was totally pointless.

How do you kill Justin Beiber? By stabbing him 38 times in the chest.

Q: John eats 50 cany bars, eats 45, how many does he have now? A: Diabetes

"It's a blimp, it's a hot air balloon!" "No wait, it's your mom."

A mathematician, a physicist, and an engineer walk into a bar. They order some drinks, sit quietly and stare at their shoes until they've finished their drinks, then go back home and wallow in loneliness, wishing their social skills weren't so abysmal.

Roses are red, violets are blue When I cut you, you bleed

What did Rihanna remember when she corrected Chris Browns tweets she can't remember last thing she saw was a fist

Three Jews are hiding under the floorboards. One of them makes a noise and a second Jew elbows him so he'll keep quiet. They are heard and are all caught. It's now their turn to seek because they are playing Hide n' Seek.

There are two cows in a field. One cow says to the other - 'Are you afraid of the mad cow disease?' The other cow says - 'No, cuz I'm a duck.'

Why was it sad for black guys drove off a cliff? There two more seats

roses are red, violets are blue, my name is dave, this makes no sense microwave.

Knock Knock Who's there? Police officer Police officer who? Police officer your whole family died in a car wreck last night.

Why did the white man buy a new pair of socks? His old ones has holes.

Whats white and can kill you if it falls out of a tree? A refridgerator

why did marybeth fall off the swing i shot her in the fart box and she died

Whats fat and gay joe diragi

What did one salt shaker say to the other salt shaker? Nothing, Salt shakers are merely used to add flavor to foods.

Why did the man jump in front of the car? He was clinically depressed, his wife left him and took the kids, he just lost his job. He thought he saw a 20 dollar bill in the street So he stopped to pick it up, not realizing a car was speeding toward him.

ROSE ARE BROWN VIOLETS ARE BROWN WHO SH*IT IN MY GARDEN!!!!!

What happened to the chicken that crossed the road. It got hit by a fridge.

Why did the woman put super glue on her sun glasses? Because she stepped on them and they broke.

I'm not wearing underwear. Why? Because I have built in underwear. :)

Why did the little girl walk into the wall? Because she was blind.

How can you tell if a duck is quaking? Hear it

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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