Why wasn't my friend laughing at my jokes? Because his grandpa is dying.

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hi little boy you want some candy i dont know do you want some candy you creeper

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so a jewish man walks into a bar. He looks at the bartender and says...this better be free

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When life gives you lemons You've got some lemons.

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what do you call a black man in the bank holding a bag of money. One wealthy man

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Hey I just met you. And this is crazy. So get in my van. Cause I have candy.

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What has four legs and a tail? A table with a tail

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What's the difference between a book and a house? Their names

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Q: Why are Cats called Lolcat? A: They forgot to put "i" between l & c

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Why did the boy get hit by a wrecking ball? Because he picked up an upside down penny.

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A fully grown cow walks into a man's house and says to him, "Hey, how have you been?" Traumatized by the vivid circumstances, the man falls to the floor and begins sobbing relentlessly until he passes out onto the floor from a violent mental breakdown.

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What did the fish say when he ran into a wall? Fish don't run.

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What sound does a dead cat make? Nothing, it's dead.

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A kid walks into a bar, everyone fled the bar because they were all afraid of goats

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust

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Q. How many alzhimers patients dose it take to screw in a light bulb? A. To get to the other side

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Parents were talking about a particular whore house and tries to keep it secret to their son. Father: Bob and I saw the house near the river, its a whore house full of prostitutes. Mother: Shhh! Our son is listening. The Son enters the room. Son: Don't mind me, I know that area. Both parents were angry: So you've been there!? Don't deny, you know! Son: Just because I know doesn't mean I've been there. I know the moon has less gravity but I haven't been there.

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A black man and a mexican man are in a car. Who is driving? The cop. The two men were best friends who had taken a month off from working in their law firm. The mexican man, Alex, had recently gone through a divorce and John decided to take him on a trip backpacking across Europe. Rain had suddenly come upon them and a passing off-duty police officer had picked them up and took them to a nearby hotel. The three men had drinks and the friends had a wonderful rest of their trip. Alex, however never got over Jenny leaving him. 3 months after their return John found him dead in his home by auto-erotic asphyxiation.

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How do you kill a cripple? You bite its fucking face off

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What's red and can't speak ? A strawberry

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What does a gay horse eat? Carrots

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What's the best sound in the world? Children screaming

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knock knock go away

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops