How many ants are in the kitchen? None. We killed them all.

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What shoots rockets but is not classed as a deadly weapon? A toy rocket launcher, I lied about the rockets.

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What is the difference between Joe Paterno and Coach Sundusky? Nothing. They are both terrible human beings and should thoroughly punished for their actions/inactions and should serve time in prison.

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What do you call a shark on land A dead shark

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Ham sandwich

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If a black person gets a tan, what do you get? A burned black sausage.

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yo momma is so ugly, she attempted to get plastic surgery and then died from the amount of blood loss she got when the surgeons realized her head was filled with tumors and they failed to extract them.

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Adele Gordon walks into a bar. The bartender says 'Why the long face?' Because she is a horse lol.

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man, i read a lot but the are some words i can pronounce

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A black man checks his watch. He sees that its 3:50, and calmly carries on with his day.

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Why did the donkey cross the road? To get to your house. Knock Knock. Who's there? Heehaw!

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I used to be an adventurer like you, but then I was raped by a giant scorpion...

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Knock knock. Who isn't there? Not me. Don't come in. I won't.

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A girl talks to here boyfriend about collage. What is his responce? Nothing. No one talks about college.

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why did the man have an axe in his car he kills children with it

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why did billy fall on the sidewalk? he got stabbed

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dat shoe shine tho

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What did the unicorn say to the horse? I have a horn and you don't.

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Shut up max im not fucking demented u dickhead

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What happened when the old man fell off the roof? He died....

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Whats worse than stubbing your toe? The Holocaust.

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What do you call an overly-sexual, chewbacca-like creature that smokes cocaine and shoots heroin, while beating its offspring? Mom.

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Why did the man jump off the cliff? Because he suffered from chronic depression as a result of frequent drug abuse.

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knock knock! who is there? its knock! knock who??? knock knock... who is there.... i told you its knock... knock who??? knock knock... WHO IS THERE!! OMG I TOLD YOU ITS KNOCK! KNOCK WHO!! WHO IS KNOCK! KNOCK KNOCK OMG WTF! HOLY SHIT WHO IS THERE! ITS KNOCK WE HAVE KNOWN EACH OTHER OUR WHOLE LIVES! KNOCK WHO?? KNOCK KNOCK WHY DONT YOU REMEMBER ME! oh knock knock from next door! who is there???? jk.. knock...knock......omg put down the gun knock knock stop i love you knock its not worth it!! NO KNOC!!! GUNSHOT* KNOCK NOOOOO!!! I LOVED YOU SOMEONE CALL 911!! OMG KNOCK WHY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! OH KNOCK WHY!!!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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