Why don't sharks attack lawyers? Professional Courtesy

Q: What do yoiuo call an Italian butler? A: Vinny

What do you call a black guy flying a plane? A pilot.

A blonde woman is creating an account for a website when she gets the "enter the following" box. The box says"How are you". She looks down at the bottom seeing the answer and puts"Good!".

Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

Why was everyone screaming bloody murder? Their home team won

What has 2 wheels and looks like a bike? A bike.

Is that a banana in your pants or do you just have an abnormally large penis?

What did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas? rockband

whats the difference between a chicken and a rooster. a rooster has a dick

What do you call a man having sex with his own mother. - Gross.

Two Muffins are in an oven the first Muffin says "whew it's hot in here." The other Muffin turns around and yells "Duh!!!."

What happened to the man who ate a piece of pizza after doing a lot of sit ups, while rubbing the belly of a fat man, and feeding his baby at the same time? He Lived

Knock knock. Who's there? Cher. Cher who? Just Cher.

What do you call your mom after she brings a guy home from a bar? A very caring woman because she doesn't want him driving drunk.

Knock Knock Knockin on heavens door..

When life gives you melons. You're not dyslexic because you can probably tell the difference between a lemon and melon because they look so different.

A man sets his house on fire. His wife comes home, what did she ask? Why'd you set the house on fire?

What did the boy who was in a chainsaw accident yell to his mom when he was on a rollercoaster? Look ma, no hands!

What's red and green and goes round and round? A kilt at a scottish dance

What makes my fourth grade librarian hot? The fact that I set her on fire

I killed someone on minecraft.

People...

How did the cookie monster die? Diabidies

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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