The air is green The grass is blue I'm bot stoned.. I'm just high

thumb_up thumb_down +26

what did the potato say to the apple nothing food can't talk

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Why was little David sad? His father got hit by a truck.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Whats the difference between a pizza and your mom? Your mom's a bitch.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Why couldn't little Jeffy find his way to gumdrop palace? Because he was shot

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Girl 1: I just can't find the man who'll make the perfect husband for me. Girl 2: Maybe you're asking for too much. Girl 1: Yeah, probably.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

What's green and fuzzy, and if it fell out of a tree it could kill you? A Pool Table.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

George Washington, a priest, a nazi and a jew are on a plane that's going to crash. There is only one parachute. George Washington says "For my country" and jumps off without a parachute. The priest says "For God" and jumps off without a parachute. The nazi says "For Hitler" and pushes the jew off and takes the parachute.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Roses are red Violets are blue I have 5 fingers and the middles for you

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Why did the black man have a Lamborghini in his garage? Because he got good grades in school, was accepted into a nice college, and earned a medical degree, which he used to get himself a well-paying job in the medical field.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

A black man, a white man and an asian man jump off a building, which one will land first? Due to the equivalence principle, they will all land at the same time.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

CNN has posted that the recent death of osama bin laden is comparable to decapitating a snake when really it is more akin to bisection of a worm.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

There was a Indain and cowboy hunting together. the Indian put his ear down to the gound and said "buffulo come". The cowboy said he didnt see anything when the Indian said, "its Sticky!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +24

You smell just like a black person. With your nose.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

How do you name a beast who eat rocks and fly. rock-eater flying beast

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What's the difference between a black guy and a white guy? One has a slightly darker skin complexion

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get away from K.F.C

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What do you say when you see a flying donkey Wtf

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Q: whats worse than being in the car for 1hour A: being in the car for 2 hours Made by: grant chapman:)

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What's big fat and ugly? A monster

thumb_up thumb_down +24

I used to be addicted to soap, but now I'm clean. I'm still addicted to heroin, though. No chance I'm ever giving that up.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

An old bear-wrestler dies and finds himself at the pearly gates. Confused and at a loss for words due to the unfamiliar circumstance and lack of public toilets, he blurts out "Saint Peter, I presume?" but it was just the train conductor. "Ticket please." He searched his pockets and finally found the ticket. He wished he had a dog, but not a seeing-eye dog because people would assume he was blind. This story illustrates the importance of situational awareness, remembering which pocket you put your ticket in, and not forgetting to go before you leave because you don't know when you'll be able to find a restroom.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

A duck walks into a bar, guess what the bartender does............ GIVES HIM A SEAT AND 6 FREE SHOTS! But instead of that the bartender promptly escort the duck out considering the fact that in all bars there is a no animal and/or pet policy so the duck went... and commitid a series of loud noises before he got to a hotel and hung itself, that is what any depressed hungover duck would do.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

A man walks into a bar and approaches a man "Ask me if I'm a tree." "Fine.Are you a tree?" "No."

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops