why did the chicken cross the road? because it felt like it!

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A blonde went to a hair dresser's one day, listening to a walkman. The hair dresser asked her what she wanted, and the blonde replied, "I need to get my hair trimmed, just make sure that you do not take these headphones off." The woman looked at the blonde, surprised, but did as she was told. While she was brushing the blonde's hair, she accidentally bumped the headphones, knocking them to the ground. As she bent down to pick them up, the blonde fell over, onto the floor. The hair dresser was very confused. She picked up the head phones and listened. This is what she heard..."breath in...breath out...breath in...breath out..."!

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Why did the police officer beat the black man? Because the Internet is able to connect a variety of different types of people together and the off-duty police officer was slightly better at the multiplayer game they were playing.

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Q: GUESS WHAT IS REALLY BAD????? A: TITTY CANCER! :0

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My mother in law fell down a wishing well, i was amazed, i never new they actually worked

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What do you call a black man on a bike? Environmentally friendly.

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How do you know when it is a Mexican's birthday? They are walking around with "happy birthday" balloons.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know, ask the chicken.

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What do you call a dog with 2 legs? Doesn't matter, it's not going to come anyways.

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Why was the phone wearing glasses? It lost its contacts!

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What did the cookie ask the glass of milk? Will you wash me down

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How many moms does it take to screw in a light bulb? None. They make you do it!

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Why does the girl get humped by a pig? Because she has sexual needs and no other more attractive animal, including an human wants to hump her.

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Knock Knock! ... Whos there? ... Daisy ... Daisy who? ... Daisy me trolling... ;)

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What's black and white and red all over? Nothing.

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Q:What happens when a bug walks into a bar A:It gets stepped on

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How do you make a dick popsickle? ...IDK! I am asking you because you look gay.

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What's worse than having a gay friend? 9/11.

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A chronic hemophilliac walks into a bar. He cuts himself and bleeds to death.

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A boy in Bible class was poking a girl in front of him with a pencil. Atfer, maybe ten minutes of this, she was asked "Sarah, what did Eve say to Adam after they had had twenty-seven children" The boy poked her with the pencil again. She stood up, and said "I think we have enough kids Adam."

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Knock knock Go away

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What's more funny than 10 dead babies in the bottom of a trash can? 1 dead baby in the bottom of 10 trash cans...

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Arab 1: Du good bai me, and I'll du good bai you. Arab 2: Ye men, sounds good men. Arab 3: O man, no way. Arab 4: K, u wait...jus wait n see.. Arab 5: I no interest! Me so saudi! Arab 6: D'oh...ha, ha, haa! Arab 7: This is so bahrain...I'm going to go club some protesters.

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When's the worst time to use skin moisturizer? When you're a burn victim.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops