Why did Jimmy fall off the swing? He had no arms. Knock-knock Who's there? Not Jimmy

What happens when your dog is bad? A crying dog who has to sleep in the BACKYARD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Stupid dog....

Women. Can't live with them. Can't systemically murder them without compromising the reproductive integrity of the species.

I went out back to bury my hoe.. with a hoe..

There are 11 people hanging onto a rope that comes down from an airplane. 10 of them are blonde, and one is a brunette. They all decide that one person should get off because if they don't, the rope will break and everyone will die. No one can decide who should go, so finally the brunette delivers a very touching speech, ending with the words, "I'll get off." The blondes, all moved by the brunette's speech, start clapping. Problem solved.

how many friends does tomas have 0 he is a loner

Jimmy's mom: Jimmy go do your chores now!! Jimmy: You shut your mouth, whore. Get your smelly ass back in the kitchen!!!

Whats worse than the Holocaust? Anal

roses are red violets are blue i bribed a hobo to eat my poopoo

White men's rights

AARgh my name is AWsaing the nawant of the where of amzai Giant rabbit bunny

Knock-Knock. Who's there? Cow that recognizes normal social cues and politely waits for its turn to speak. Cow that recognizes normal social cues and politely waits for its turn to speak who? Moo.

chuck norris was shot yesterday... tomorrow is the bullets funeral.

why are there so many homeless asians with squinty eyes, they cant find their way back home

Roses are red, Violets are blue Poems don't have to rhyme

You can pick your friends, and you can pick your nose, but you can't eat your friends Nose it is!

Why Bono always walk barefoot ? Because he's an asshole.

Why couldn't billy hear his mom on the phone? Because Billy is deaf.

roses are red violets are blue me + you =the perfect 2

what do you call a black guy with a bachelor's degree? by his first name, "Carl".

Why did the bartender leave the bar? He worked really long hours and finally needed some time to sleep.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Your mom.

What's the difference between your mom and a table? The table has legs.

Why couldn't Timmy go to the bathroom? He was constipated.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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