what do you call a deer with no eyes? Blind

thumb_up thumb_down +7

theres a taco and a blonde...who eats who? the blonde eats the taco.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

How do you treat someone that is feels like a total failure? Treatment: Okay, draw a square on the board over there, but in order to succeed, you must fail at it. Patient one: Oh, I drew a cicrle :( Patient two: I drew a square :( Congratulations one you succeeded at failing! Now get outta here. Congratulations patient two, you succeeded at the given task, bye bye.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why was the snowman afraid of the sun? Because he would melt that day and die

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What's green and eats rocks? A green rock eater What's purple and eats rocks? It hasn't been discovered by science yet...

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Okay, after this one then...

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What has 2 legs and smells like fish A fish with 2 legs

thumb_up thumb_down +7

why did the zombie eat bob because bob was delicious

thumb_up thumb_down +7

You know the drill, the world is not as black and white as it was before, just because we are not on the same side, does not make us enemies either. As for whatever is going on, I can assure you I had nothing to do with the fall of the first underground, and neither will I make sure whatever you scraped together, large or small falls either, I realize I should have thought this trough some more, but we had little time to act on this one.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. Why did the dog cross the road? To eat the chicken. Why did the police officer cross the road? To tranquilize the dog and the chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

so there is a 13 year old boy who got left home while the rest of his family was driving to colorado, so the police comes to his door, and says son your whole family has just died in a plane accident. And the boy says, but my family was driving. . . the policeman then says, i'm aware, the plane actually hit their car and only killed your family.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What are the last words of a child dieing of cancer ? Nothing because he is to ill to speak

thumb_up thumb_down +7

whats funny about this joke? nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why did Johnathan drop his popsicle? He was hit by a bus. Knock knock? Who's there? Not Johnathan

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What do you catch a baby with? A pitchfork

thumb_up thumb_down +7

why did the black man apply for a job at kfc? His family was in debt after the loss of his father.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Q: What's the difference between a Porsche and a pile of dead babies? A: I don't have a Porsche in my garage. But I don't have a pile of dead babies either. So, yeah.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Where is Jew University? Berlin, Germany

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Frostbite. He died the following day.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why were 5 tall white guys sitting on a bench? They were in the NBA

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why did little Jimmy go crying to his mummy? Because she was shot.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

David shut the fuck up your cat has asthma and i dropped a weight on its little fucking head that pikey should of drowned it furthermore your sister looks like a greasy alien

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What is green and has wheels? A blue car.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Actually, violets are violet

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops