Why was the Irish Cop happy to see the Mexican family killed in a accident? Because the Lopez family were a family known for generosity and selflessness. It came as no surprise to anyone who knew Steven Lopez and his beloved family that they were all organ donors and not only that but Shelly Lopez, Steven's oldest daughter had blood type O negative (the universal donor). Officer McO'Brianiganly's wife is dying in the hospital in need of a kidney transplant, doctors have given her just weeks to live. Now, thanks to unfortunate events for la familia Lopez., Officer McO'Brianiganly and his wife can live a long happy life together, just as they always imagined.

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A man buys a kitten from the store. He gets home, takes it out of its cage, and realizes that it wasn't the kitten he wanted. He then returns to the store and exchanges for the kitten he originally wanted, but then decides to keep both because he is feeling particularly hungry.

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Question: why did the pilot crash the plane? Answer: because the pilot was a loaf of bread

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What did the blond do on October 12th? Get hit by a bus

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I wanted to burn alot of calories so i found a fat kid and set him on fire. :3

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Why did you fall? Because of my buttcrack.

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Persond A: A guy blows himself and his family up with a hand grenade Person B: HEY!!! Thats not funny thats how my family died

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A man went to the doctor and told him he was having the strangest dream. "First I was a tee pee Then I was a wigwam A tee pee, a wigwam. Do you have any idea what could be wrong?" The doctor looked at the man and said "You have aids."

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Have you seen the movie "Gay Men Say No"? Oh yes, that is very insightful documentary on the modern day struggles of homosexuality.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I've got Alzheimer's Cheese on toast

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What do you get when Justin Bieber mates with a beaver? Nothing, the species are too genetically different to produce offspring

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one man walked into a bar and ordered a beer. when he was drinking the beer he choked and died

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What did one cat say to the other cat? --------- Meow --------- What's pink and fluffy? --------- Pink fluff --------- What's green and yellow? --------- Grass. I lied about the yellow part.

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Why did the blond check your phone? AIDS

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bologna

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What's white and can't climb a tree? A fridge

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What do you call a window you can see throu? A window.

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Why did the black man walk into a bar? To order a drink.

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Roses are red Violets are blue The other color on our flag is white I'm an American and rhyming doesn't matter

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The boy said to the priest, may God be with you. The priest responded with, "And also IN you".

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Q: How do you confuse a blond A: You don't they are born that way

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Hi. P.S: You have aids. P.P.S: Purple penis pumpernickel pie puppets.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To rape the hen.

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DUH DUH DUH DRAMATIC HAMSTER

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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