Why did the boy die? He got hit by the school bus.

Knock knock Who's there? Benjamin Benjamin who? Benjamin Dover Ben! I'm so glad you're home the kids have missed you so much!

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was shot.

How do you make a clown shut up? Throw a axe at it!!

OMG I was sexting my friend and I accidentally sent my naked picture to my parents. What do I do? Tell your friend that you accidentally sent your naked picture to your parents.

Why did Justin Bieber wake up Lady Gaga? He needed to ask her a question.

Your mom is so stupid, she stole free samples.

Two muffins in an oven. One muffin turns to the other and says nothing, because muffins cannot talk.

Guy: I have a penis growing out of my crotch. Girl: Hah, sucks to be you! Guy: Yeah.

*insert corny "a man walks into a bar" joke here*

It's likely that very few people will read this.

Why was it really gross when the blonde dove into the swimming pool? Because the swimming pool was full of phlegm!

Roses are red Violets are blue one plus one Equals two

What does a cookie and the twin towers have in common? They both crumble.

Q: Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? A: Because she was a woman.

A man starts acting weird in a resturant, the waiter says "whats the problem sir?" The man says "I'm choking and I just died."

haha

Q - What's the difference between a Park Bench and a Black Man ? A - The Park Bench can support a family.

What's green and bounces? An envious kangaroo.

Q: Why was the american flag red, white, and blue? A:Because that's how it is!

Where do cows get cultured? They don't, they get slaughtered first.

Bob: Whats the difference between a fish and a microwave? Steve: I don't know Bob: Daaaamn your dumb!

What did the chubby, dirty, hobo get for Christmas? Cancer

A man goes to the movies with his wife, two hours later they drive home and find their house just the way they left it.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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