What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a dog in your apple

How do you put elephant in refrigerator? Open the door, and put the elephant in

What's worse than the holocaust? Dropping your biscuit in your cup of tea.

Roses are red, violets are blue I've got Alzheimer's cheese on toast

A man walks into a bar and sits down. The bartender then lights him on fire.

What do you call a snooker cue that only hits stripes? Anything you want, it can't hear you.

what's the difference between a pound of liver and vomit? £3.24

A black man, a small child, and a priest were all standing in line. They were all checking in the hospital after being in a 3 car pileup

Whats the same between an elephant and a grape? They're both purple except for the elephant

Roses are red, violets are blue, I'm not good at poems, nice tits.

Fact: Nine out of ten Americans believe that out of ten people one will always disagree with the other nine.

Why couldn't Billy write his own name... ...because he was wearing purple lemonade???

Why did the boy cry? Because he was a crybaby

In my eyes Nero, you are much like a philosopher, the kind which are mocked while they live, and then a couple thousands years later, are recognized as the most intelligent beings of their time.

Hey

I hate when people see me at the store and are like "What are you doing here??" and Im just like, "Oh, you know, hunting elephants..."

Q: What do you call a colour blind person that smells like green paint? A: A painter

Your mother is average.

Your momma so stupid, she speaks poorly and can't spell very well.

A man asked a horse "Why such a long face?" The Horse replies "My entire family just died in a plane crash."

two peanuts walked into a bar they both sat down and immediately left once they found out the bar was serving peanuts.

kennah campion when she talks

What does Chuck Norris order at McDonalds? A Big Mac with a large fry and drink.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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