A train conducter conducts goes at 60mph, when he goes under a bridge he goes at 52mph. When he goes over a hill he goes at 47mph. If he goes under 3 bridges and over 6 hills what did the conductors mother eat for dinner that night. Nothing, after many months of suffering she died from Huntington's disease.

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A brunette, redhead, and a blond were on a road trip when their car broke down in the middle of a desert. The red-head offered to walk down the road to get help, for none of them knew how to repair the car. She walked down the road in the direction they were headed, but never came back. The redhead and blond died several days later in the shade of the car as a result of extensive heat exhaustion.

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Why shouldn't you download music? Various reasons.

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Bill went into a store and bought a bagel. However, after eating it, he realizes he meant to buy a doughnut. He tells the cashier that he meant to order a doughnut, and asks for his money back. The cashier says no and the man leaves.

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(waving left hand) Why doesn't Queen Elizabeth wave with this hand? Why? Because this is my hand.

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Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? You would too if your name was Gnrwhaf

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Why did the mother stop breastfeeding her son? Because he was twenty five.

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- Knock, knock. - Who's there? - Immigration.

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What did one alligator say to the other alligator? Ear

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MR MCANN WHAT COLOUR IS YOUR PUBES ?

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"I see." said the blind man to his deaf son.

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What was the asian person's name? I don't know, I never met him.

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whats black, white, and bloody all over? i don't know, but we should stop making jokes and help it already.

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Your mama's so hairy, she has to shave occasionally.

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What do you call a dog with two tails? ...Depends what its name is.

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If the blue man lives in the blue house, and the yellow man lives in the yellow house, who lives in the white house? The blue man. He has made a good living with a high salary and has enough money to afford two houses.

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The man was so gay he grew breasts and got breast cancer.

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What the difference between a car and a dead child I dont have a car in the basement

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Why did the fat guy pick up a noodle from the floor with his buttcheeks? He felt like pasta.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Jehovah's Witness. Oh come on in, I would love to learn more about your religion.

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Q: What is green, jumps and says i'm a frog? A: A frog that talks

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What did Jimmy get for his first bithday A coffin

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What do you get when u cross a owl and a bungy cord...........my ass

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What did the penguin wearing a blue sweater say to the sink? I am a penguin wearing a blue sweater.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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