Why did the goose cross the road? Because the chicken was on vacation

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What do you call a guy wearing a white leisure suit? Mister Rourk? No, you call the dud wearing the white duds.

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My, you you... SEDUCER! XD, and there I go proving your point by going uppercase XD

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What did the little boy say to a stranger? Nothing. He is very shy, and his parents always said to never talk to strangers.

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ok, so a blue flower in a meadow dances valiantly, while being watched by a chipmunk. the king of the sky fairies ate an apple and a chicken and a pear, and a cumkwuat and frog legs and a bone and a library and a jeep and fig and a rhino and a sword but fairies don't have that big of mouths to eat all of that, so this never happened

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One day an irishman walked into a bar. he started to show off his accent when a nicely dressed lady said to him, "are you from ireland?". "AYE" said the irshman. " what part of ireland are you from?" drunk, the irishman replied "uh downtown" then the woman said, " did you come here alone?" then he replied"no i didn't come here a'lone.....DONKEY!!!"

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How do you confuse a blonde? You put her in a round room and tell her to find the corner.

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Whats red, and spins at fast speeds? A baby in a blender

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How do you get an elephant into a refrigerator? you open the door and guide him inside

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Who's looking for judicial toenail clippings?

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Why was the black man carrying the television away from the store? He bought it

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Knock Knock Knockin on heavens door..

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Hey look, I found a fire hydrant!

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THE GAME

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An irishman walks into a bar and stays there until he goes home.

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My left foot has 6 toes, my right face has 8 Q-tips -Matt

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Why can't Stevie Wonder read? He has retinopathy of prematurity and was born blind.

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A Jewish man walkes into grocery store. He buys some groceries, and leaves.

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I am quite mature.

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Whats funny about alexis? she's really a boy!

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A Polack walks into a bar. Which makes sense because the bar was in Warsaw.

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? A vet.

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How many electricians with a suitable ladder does it take to change a bulb? If the bulb fitting is now obsolete it may not be possible.

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A man walks into a bar. On the way home, he is driving, careers off the road and crashes. Lesson here. Don't walk into poles

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops